


At First Sight

by eilonwe



Series: Music of my Heart [1]
Category: Aoi - Fandom, Gackt - Fandom, the GazettE
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-11
Updated: 2013-11-17
Packaged: 2018-01-01 03:36:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 35,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1039892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eilonwe/pseuds/eilonwe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gackt has always maintained that he is straight. That he has absolutely no interest in men whatsoever, despite his frequently risque bouts of fan-service on stage.  One day while on a game show the host asks him "Do you believe in love at first sight? What if it was a guy?"  </p><p>Gackt replies that "It wouldn't matter their gender, I would just walk up and kiss them".   Fate conspires to make him eat his words.  Now he seems to be falling for a beautiful man, but can he overcome his determination to remain heterosexual ? Or will he give in to 'Love At First Sight?'</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fateful words

Chapter 1

_“Gackt-sama do you believe in love at first sight?” The excited host asked._

_  
“Yes, I do” Gackt replied, looking serious._

_  
“What would you do if that happened, if you fell in love at first sight?” The host asked, looking curious._

_  
“_ _It wouldn’t matter what their gender was, if I fell in love at first sight, I’d just walk up and kiss them.  I’d never let them go.” Gackt replied, with all seriousness._

_  
“So you’re saying if you saw him and instantly fell in love with him, you would just walk up and kiss him?” The host asked, pointing to his co-host._

_  
“ **Yes** ” _

Gackt woke up from his dream shaking his head, a small smile on his face, remembering the look of fear on the poor hosts face. Grayson was good natured enough – he would have played along and given him a mind blowing kiss to drive the audience wild, but the host had run away, which worked just as well. It still annoyed him that people _would not_ believe that he wasn’t at least bisexual. Especially with the staged erotic fan-service he performed for his fans.  But repeatedly, until he was almost blue in the face, he had said that men just didn’t do it for him sexually, that he needed a woman to satisfy him. Wasn’t that clear enough? And yet he enjoyed teasing his fans with fan-service on stage. Didn’t they understand that there was a difference between kissing your friends for fun and like _really_ kissing a guy and _meaning_ it? I mean look at all the heterosexual women on the dance floor who start kissing their girlfriends in imitation of fan-service, do they get accused of being lesbian? No. Cheered on, yes, but not really accused as long as they are willing to still dance with the guys. Pfft. But let him French kiss Masa on stage and all of sudden he’s gay, or at least bi.  ** _Well, it’s just my sex appeal. Everyone wants a piece of my magnum_** , Gackt smirked to himself. And yet the dream bothered him. _Why am I remembering something that happened over 4 years ago?_  
  
Gackt got dressed and read over his schedule for the day. He had a business meeting from 6am-7am and then rehearsal with the band until 5pm. The other members each had other plans for the evening which actually left Gackt with some time on his hands **.** ** _I think I'll just walk in the city. I haven't done that in a long time, And as long as I wear a disguise maybe I won’t be recognized_** ** _._**  Gackt headed for the garage planning to discuss his disguise with Cha when he got to rehearsal.  
  
The meeting was boring as usual, but they were able to accomplish much. Plans were made for the layout of the new album, artwork was considered and first rejections made of the submissions, and times for his next television appearances were set. His step got lighter and quicker as he approached the studio. Music truly was the nourishment of his soul, and he _always_ looked forward to playing and composing, striving for something NEW something BETTER. Rehearsal went smoothly and in the end he decided that he’d forgo the disguise after all. He would simply go out in his suit and sunglasses and take his chances that he won’t get mobbed. He’d have his body guards follow him to come assist if he has need.  
  
Walking along the brick sidewalk, Gackt passed a café with outdoor tables and glancing over, someone caught his eye. _Someone_ at a table leaning against a garden wall, surrounded by blood red roses, and bathed in moonlight. The stranger’s eyes were closed so he didn’t _see_ Gackt’s approach. And because of the noise of the other diners he didn’t _hear_ Gackt’s approach either. Gackt was just _drawn_ to him. Drawn to stare at him, the way others were drawn to stare at Gackt. Gackt wasn’t even aware that the stranger was male until he was closer, closer, _too close_. Gackt was aware that his mouth was hanging slightly open but right at that moment he had never seen anyone so beautiful in all his life. The stranger’s skin glowed pale with the moonlight, his black hair taking sapphire and violet highlights, his lips were full and the same dark red of the roses. He had a lip ring – glinting in the moonlight bright against his red, red lips.

Gackt noticed that he had make-up on, but it wasn’t heavy and seemed to suit his light & shadow features perfectly. Before Gackt even realized what he had done, he was inches away from the stranger, reaching out for him. _ **What am I doing?**_   He stopped, his hand hovering above the stranger’s cheek and the stranger turned his head toward it. Gackt sucked in his breath. Afraid the stranger will open his eyes, will see him there kneeling in front of him trying to …. Trying to what?  _ **Trying to steal a kiss, just a kiss…to wake the sleeping beauty**_.

With a small prayer, for what he wasn’t sure for there were butterflies in his stomach, Gackt leaned forward and as the tips of his fingers brushed the stranger’s ear he kissed those oh so mesmerizing lips. The stranger’s lips were warm and soft except for the lip-ring which was slightly colder and Gackt whimpered ever so quietly, the little sting of static shock the lip-ring gave him seemed to run straight to his groin. But the stranger jerked back at the static shock, not quite out of Gackt’s reach.  
  
 _“What the…_ ” Aoi pulled back trying to focus on the person who had just kissed him. Woman or Man? As his eyes finally focus and he sucks in a breath preparing to unleash a string of curses, he stops. ** _Oh My God It’s Gackt! No Fucking Way Did Gackt Just Kiss Me!_**  Aoi’s eyes got a little wider and an eyebrow raised. Gackt let out a nervous half laugh “Um… I..”  ** _But Gackt isn’t into guys. He’s said that a million and a half times_** **.** ** _God, I’ve wanted to kiss him so many times. Just once. No way am I passing this up_** **.** _If he can he steal a kiss so can I!_  

Before Gackt could say anything more Aoi leaned forward and kissed him, his own hand reaching to cradle Gackt’s head. Once more an electric shock ran through them both from Aoi’s lip-ring and Gackt once again whimpered at the sensation, lost to all thought but this kiss. Gackt, his head swimming, who was balanced on his ankles felt his ankles turn to jello -- lost his balance and fell backwards un-gloriously and quite ungracefully on his ever so beautiful ass. Gackt stared up at Aoi with a stunned look on his face. Aoi touched his lips and smiled at Gackt “Thank You.” he whispered.    _I’d better run before he remembers I’m a guy and kicks my ass. He’s rather famous for his revenge. And he’s taller than me. I’d better get a head start **.**_  Aoi had already paid his bill, and had just been resting his eyes, digesting his meal and listening to the sounds of the city. He got up and ran away like …. Like a schoolgirl running away from her crush whom she’s just pecked on the cheek. _Only I did more than peck him on the cheek. I just hope he doesn’t find out who I am. Good thing he’s independent. At least I don’t have to worry about running into him at the studio._  
  
It was a good 30 seconds before Gackt’s brain decided to register the fact that Gackt was sprawled on his ASS in the middle of the sidewalk, that he had _just kissed and been kissed by a guy_ , and that said guy was missing. Gackt felt … jilted.  _He didn’t even tell me his name! He just said thank you! Why, I'm not some stranger, I'm GACKT!_ GAckt face-palmed himself _._ ** _I did NOT just think that did I?_** ** _I must be losing my mind. I need to talk to Cha.  God I hope no one recognized me. GOD I HOPE NO ONE TOOK PICTURES!!_**  He glanced around fearfully, but while there _were_ some smirks on people’s faces, no one was pointing and no one had their cell phones out. So he heaved an embarrassed sigh and got to his feet. Surprised at how shaky this legs were. He called for his car to pick him up. Suddenly he didn’t feel up to walking anymore. He called Cha’s number. “Cha…um…it’s Gackt, listen… um. When you get done could you come over to my place? I need to talk to you about something. Um no... Private….. **_Personal_**. Yeah. Tonight. Now? Are you sure? I thought you had plans? Cha I don’t want to interrupt your plans, it can wait a few hours really. If you’re sure. Thanks – I mean it. I’ll see you there.” Gackt sighed. Cha was one of his oldest friends since his split with Malicious and was the only one he felt he could open up to. He knew that Cha wouldn’t judge him, no matter what. And that Cha would keep all his secrets.


	2. omg I kissed a guy I liked it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gackt confesses his reaction to kissing to Aoi

Chapter 2

Cha hung up the phone and turned to his friends. “I gotta go. Family emergency. I’ll catch up with you guys another time neh?”  Cha was worried. Gackt had  _never_ as long as he could ever remember, called him like this. Had never said he needed him like this.  _Had never asked for something so personal without it being pulled out of him with a crowbar._  And he was supposed to just continue to party with his friends? Of course not. He would drop everything. Because while Gackt may demand 200% professionally, he asked for so little personally. He wondered what was wrong.  _Something happened. Something had to have happened. He wasn’t gone out that long. But what?_  Cha’s car only went airborne 3 times on his way to Gackt’s house. He was fairly shocked that he missed getting pulled for speeding. _Karma must want me to be at my friend’s side tonight_.

Gackt heard his doorbell ring just minutes after he got home. Then he heard knocking. Then he heard his doorbell again. He opened the door to find a very distressed Cha at his doorstep. “What’s wrong? What happened? Something happened! You never call me like this. Are you hurt? Where’s the body? Whu..” Gackt laughed and hugged his friend, dragging him inside. “Will you shut up already! If you’ll come inside and let me get a word in edgewise I MIGHT just tell you. Otherwise, I’ll just keep it to myself ….” 

Cha pulled away from the hug a little “You beast! You wouldn’t dare! I did not just drop everything to be left hanging. You must tell me everything, what is going on in that devious brain of yours?” Gackt sighed and pulled out of the hug, draping an arm over Cha’s shoulders leading him into living room. “Come on, we need a drink.”

“WE need a drink? Oh, THIS is gonna be good.”

Gackt poured them both a glass of Courvoisier and came back to the couch. “Cha… I think maybe… I don’t know. I’ve lost my mind? Or. Can I ask you question?”

“Duh… silly you just did.”

Gackt shot him an annoyed look. “Chaaaa this is fucking serious.  _Please_. Um…Have you ever kissed someone and your brain just … disconnected…. Like you were so lost in the kiss you couldn’t even remember your own  _name_  and even your legs like… turned to jello?”

Cha stifled a snicker. “Dude Gackt… haven’t you ever been kissed senseless before?”

“I’ve heard women talk about it, but … I’ve never experienced it before… tonight.”

“So who is she?”

Gackt coughed. And blushed. All the way from the roots of his hair to the tips of his toes.

“Gee Gackt… I didn’t know toes could blush… was she underage?”

Gackt coughed again, and rubbed the back of his neck. “Um well see, um… the kissed I… NO! How could you even think I’d kiss someone underage?!”  Gackt cast an outraged look at Cha. He sighed. “No… No… it’s  _worse_  than that.”

Cha laughed. “What could be worse than kissing an underage girl?” Cha gasped. “Oh my god, tell me you didn’t kiss a fangirl!”

Gackt heaved an exasperated sigh “Cha will you please stop! This is hard enough as it is… but no. No. Not an underage girl. Not a fangirl.  I…  [ohmygodchaIkissedaguyforrealandIreallylikedit!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4V27zB-t-k)”

“Run that by me again….. I didn’t quite catch that. It sounded like you said you kissed a guy.”

Gackt couldn’t do anything but cough into his palms. Still too embarrassed to look Cha in the face.

“ But… But I don’t **_like_** guys Cha. Why couldn’t I stop myself? Why did I kiss him? Why did it feel so **_nice_**? Why do I feel like …. Giddy with joy at the memory and … at the same time dammit I want to cry because I didn’t even get his name… he ran away! Like,  I almost feel _jilted_. God, I’m pitiful.” Gackt sighed heavily and finally looked up, tears in his eyes. “God, Cha he was  _so_  beautiful. You should have seen him. I couldn’t help it…I think I miss him. What’s happening to me Cha? I don’t understand. I don’t understand any of this. I’m all mixed up.”

Cha looked at his friend with his mouth hanging wide open. He couldn’t have been more surprised if…if… well he just couldn’t be more surprised. He began to laugh. “Gackt… my friend. You. Are. In. Love. That’s what’s _wrong_. You always said that you believed in love at first sight. And if it hit you, you would just walk up to that person and kiss them. I guess you should have watched what you said. Fate made you eat your words.”

“But … But I don’t like guys. I like women.”

“Yes. That’s certainly true. But you like _this_ guy, right?  Gackt. Love happens very rarely in our lives. Especially lives like ours. Just because you are attracted to ONE guy, and absolutely no others, I don’t think that changes your sexuality any. I mean you aren’t suddenly attracted to other men are you?”

“Eew, god no! Fan-service is fun, but you know men don’t turn me on. But …I think you are right, it’s just this **_one_** guy who has me tied up in knots. You really think I’m in love? But it was just one kiss!”

“Yeah, but it knocked you on your ass didn’t it?”

“Hey how did you know that?”

Cha snickered. “Your legs went jello remember… stands to reason you fell on your ass!”

Gackt finally laughed. “I’m really in it aren’t I Cha? I’m in love, and with a  _guy_ , and I don’t even know his name. What am I gonna do? What if this gets  _out_?”

Cha reached over and smacked him on the forehead,  _hard_.

“Ow! What was that for?!”

Cha smacked him  _again_. “You coulda had a V-8! IDIOT! What do you  _think_  it was for! You  _finally_  fall for someone and you’re worried about  _appearances_? Since when have you ever given a  _flying fuck_  about what people think of you? You’ve _always_ done your own thing, and to hell with it, if people think you’re being weird. So, just tell them to either fuck off, mind their own damn business, or tell them you fell in love. Whatever. Burn that bridge when you get to it why don’t you.”

“I’m really not thinking straight am I?” Gackt whined rubbing his forehead.

“No, but being pole-axed by love will do that to you. How about tomorrow, we retrace your steps and see if we can’t track down the love of your life huh?”

“But we have rehearsal tomorrow.”

“And I am bandleader, and I say practice is cancelled for an important personal business matter. And my word is law… bwahahaha! Bandleader is god of rehearsal schedule. Good thing I love you right?” Cha grinned at Gackt. He was going to love torturing his friend about this. He was incredibly happy for Gackt that he was in love, but it was going to be damn funny watching him squirm with the fact that he was in love with a guy…. Ahh he just knew what was going to come next. Gackt knew that Cha was bisexual. He just had to stifle a giggle at the thought of an incredibly embarrassed, blushing Gackt coming to him for sex advice. Cha wondered if Gackt would be Seme or Uke…  ** _Seme_**. He thought.  ** _Definitely Seme. I just can’t picture my egostical Gackt letting anyone top him. But then again, love will do crazy things. Hell, I’m usually Seme, but for the right partner I’ve played Uke and loved it_**.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoi's reaction to the kiss does not go unnoticed by his bandmates

Chapter 3

Aoi literally skipped into the Studio building the next morning. He even wore his lip ring, which he hadn’t been wearing during the day.  _This little baby is my little luck charm now. Oh my god I still can’t believe I kissed Gackt!_  He touched his lips and smiled, stifling a giggle.  _I’m acting like some silly schoolgirl._ He continued bouncing his way into practice. It wasn’t long though before he was busted. “All right! That’s enough! Which one of you did it! Fess up!” Kai threw down his drum sticks and glared at his bandmates. They all gave him equally confused and bemused looks. Kai pointed a finger at Aoi “Which one of you idiots gave Aoi REDBULL! Was it you Reita?” Reita backed up a step in trepidation. “What! No, Kai I swear, hey I even switched his coffee to decaff months ago! Really!” Reita cast a look at Aoi and mouthed the words “sorry”. At which point Aoi just collapsed in giggles on the couch. Ruki and Uruha just stared at him. Ruki elbowed Uruha “That  _is_ giggling I hear right?  _Aoi_  is  _giggling_. I thought that was  _your_ job?” Uruha stifled a gigglesnort of his own “Not any more, apparently.”   Kai used the moment of distraction to launch a pillow at Aoi’s head.

               “Hey what was that for?” Aoi replied a little breathless from laughing so hard. “Aoi you are one of the most emo guys in this band and you are  _giggling_  on the couch. Something is seriously fucking wrong with this picture. Now  _talk_  before I call the men in white coats to bring you a hug-me jacket so you won’t feel so alone with your giggle-fits. Care to share what is so incredibly funny that you can’t concentrate on practice?” 

Aoi grinned and failed at giving a wounded look at Kai “hey, you resemble that remark! I am not emo. And I’m not tripping on Red-bull either. I’m just high ….. on life! And  _you_  , Kai, are freaking  _adorable_  when you’re pissed, did you know that?” 

Kai threw his hands up in the air. “I give up! You are disturbed, do you know that? There’s something wrong with you. You are not right in the head. Let’s take a break. Go run few laps around the building and burn off some of that energy will you…. You’re making me tired just looking at you!” Aoi leapt up off the couch “ _Break! Break! Gimme a break! Break me off a piece of that kit-kat-bar…”_  Aoi began singing and managed to get through the doorjamb just as a drumstick narrowly missed his head.

               Uruha gaped after Aoi. His mouth had been practically hanging open for the last five minutes. He couldn’t remember Aoi ever being this happy, this giggly, this  _bouncy_.  _There’s only one thing that could turn a quiet, almost emo guy into a bouncing pile of giggles overnight – and that’s love. Aoi is in love! OH. MY. GOD. And no one else has caught on._  Uruha just had to find out about this new conquest. Aoi had been in relationships before, but none that made him bounce like Tigger.  _Wait, if Aoi is Tigger, who am I? um…. Pooh Bear… because I’m cute and cuddly and wise…. But I’m thinner and much better looking!_  Satisfied with his self-image as a wise and faithful (but thin) Pooh-bear to the rescue, Uruha padded down the hall in search of  Aoi. Uruha found Aoi on the roof smoking a cigarette and drinking a Pepsi Max. “Kai is going to kill you if finds out you’ve been drinking caffeine AND ginseng. At least its diet, I don’t think we could handle a sugar-rush too.” Aoi shrugged, “Gee I guess I shouldn’t let him find my stash of Mountain Dew: Game fuel then. It’s got all the sugar and like 1.5 times the caffeine! Hehe! So. What brings you up here Kou?” Uruha eyed his friend carefully. “You are  _bouncy_. You never bounce. That's MY department. You are  _giggling_.  ALSO my department. Your department is  _sexy brooding_. I do not do brooding well. It’s this damn ducky-lip pout of mine. It’s just too cute, people never take me seriously. If you aren’t hyped up on sugar, caffeine, or drugs, then there is only one thing I can think of that can make a guy like you this bouncy overnight. Aoi…You’re in love. So. Who is she? I promise not to tell the other guys, but you look about to have an  _aneurysm_  if you don’t tell someone -- so spill it. I’m all ears.”

               Aoi placed his hand on Uruha’s shoulder and pecked him on the lips. “ooooh, But I love your ducky-pout, and you’re right it is cute. Finally, after all these years you own up to your ducky-pout. It’s about time Uruha.” Aoi let out a little laugh and pulled away. He looked out over the city. “But, ah. I don’t know if it’s love really. Just an absolutely, positively, mind-blowing kiss. I mean --  have you ever kissed somebody, and you just lost yourself in the way they smelled, and the feel of their hair under your fingertips? Their taste on your tongue, and like every nerve in your body just sang? Like everywhere your clothes touched your skin it felt like a caress, and you just wanted to climb right inside that kiss and drown in it? Has a …….Has a kiss ever given you an orgasm?” Aoi blushed at the last sentence and looked down at his feet.  _That was another reason I ran away. Talk about premature ejaculation. If we ever get together I hope I have better staying power than just one kiss._

“Dayum! An orgasmic kiss huh? That’s a new one. I definitely have got to meet this girl. Anyone who can do that for you with just a kiss has got some serious talent. She doesn’t have a brother does she?” Uruha grinned.  _Oh yeah. He’s in love. He just doesn’t know it yet._  Aoi coughed. “Well, actually. Um. It wasn’t exactly a girl. It was a guy. See I was dozing at my table and he sneaked up and kissed me. And it was – wow nice shock. So I opened my eyes to see who kissed me, and – Oh My God Kou! It was Ga- It was a really beautiful man who looked really embarrassed that he kissed me. Like he didn’t look like the kind of guy who likes guys you know? But I leaned forward and I kissed him back, and Oh God – It was…”  Aoi sighed as his eyes rolled back in head at the memory, his body shuddering in remembered bliss.  “…. Amazing! And then I ran away before he could get mad at me for kissing him or see that I came in my pants.”   
  
              “ Let me get this straight. You just experienced _the_ most mind-blowing, orgasmic, kiss of your life – AND YOU RAN AWAY?” Uruha reached over and smacked Aoi on the forehead,  _hard_. “Ow! What was that for?” Uruha rolled his eyes. “You coulda had a V-8, BAKA! And you know who he was, you almost let his name slip. And the way you almost let his name slip means I might know him too. Come on Aoi, we’ve got to help you win this guy. I mean did he seem like he liked the kiss too?” 

Aoi pinked with embarrassment. “I think so. I think we both moaned, I can’t really remember. If I tell you his name do you swear to me you won’t tell anyone?  ** _Please_** Uruha. If this gets out -- It could be so bad for both of us. And I really respect him. I don’t want to hurt him. I would rather not pursue this at all then to be the start of bad rumors. Please. Promise me?” Uruha wrinkled his eyebrows together.  _So Aoi was in love with, and kissed, someone he respected but didn’t want to cause rumors for. And someone who isn’t into guys and looked embarrassed at having kissed him… and whose name starts with Ga-_

Uruha’s eyes got big. “No fucking way. You. Did not. Kiss. **_Gackt_**. Did you?” Aoi let out a shy smile. “He kissed me first.” Uruha’s jaw dropped to the floor. “But he doesn’t like guys. He’s only said that like a million times. …. He doesn’t like guys… _but maybe he likes you_ … our beautiful little flower… you know this is going to be the most difficult chase you’ve ever had don’t you? He’s a virgin for heaven’s sake. You’ll have to seduce him in spite of himself _and_ his ego. You’ll have to convince him to accept you in spite of the fact you’re a guy. Woah dude… which one of you is gonna be Uke?”  Uruha face-palmed himself.  “ TMI… I don’t wanna know. First we have to find out what his reaction is. And get him to go out with you. Hehe…  _Operation Seduction_ is underway.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our friends are stupid

Chapter 4

Cha sat at the café table drinking a glass of wine. It was funny actually. Gackt was across the street in his SUV watching. They were staking out the café, hoping his mystery man would show back up at the scene of the amazing kiss. Gackt’s pride wouldn’t let  _him_  be the one to wait at the table.  ** _Mustn’t appear desperate. Although he keeps texting me every 30 seconds. This from the man who hates to text message._**  Cha waited, scanning the crowd for any sign of any man who might fit the description Gackt had given him. “He’s beautiful Cha. He’s pale like me, and has black hair that’s so black it has blue and violet highlights. And he’s got dark eyes like a cup of good espresso coffee. And his lips are the same exact shade as the roses on the garden wall near the table and he has a silver lip ring that’s just small and bright against his lips and draws your gaze there….” Cha stopped him there.   “Ok, Cassinova. I think I have enough to get started. If I see someone I think might fit, I’ll take a picture with my cell phone and send it to you and you can confirm ok? Just relax. Turn on the radio, listen to a CD. I got the new Dim cd by The GazettE, it’s pretty good you should listen to it.

               Uruha pushed through the crowd, heaving an exasperated sigh.  _The things I do for my friend_. “Go to the café won’t you? See if Gackt shows up again for me. Pleeeeease?? I’ll buy you strawberry pocki….” Uruha had a description of the table Aoi had been sitting at, and prepared himself to spend a boring evening people watching. As he neared the table he noticed that it was already occupied.  _Great, Just Great. I’ll have to change my plans now_. But as he got closer, he thought he recognized the occupant. Nah… can’t be! Uruha stifled a giggle. “Cha-san! How pleasant to meet you here. May I join you?” Cha looked up and saw a young red-headed gentleman standing in front of him. He was rather handsome and had a cute sort of pout to him… then the pout registered in Cha’s brain. “Ah, Uruha-san. Welcome, welcome. Sure, have a seat. I’m really enjoying the new album by the way. It’s almost too bad that Gacktjob is independent, we don’t get to hang out with the other bands like we used to when we were with a company. So what brings you out to the city tonight?” Uruha snickered when Cha said ‘Gacktjob’ but just smiled. “Oh, just running an errand for a friend, and you?” Cha smiled. “The same.” Cha continued to scan the crowd. Still no sign of the mysterious man he was looking for. Cha sighed. “If you don’t mind my asking, you seem to be looking for someone. “ Cha blushed “uh, yeah. Kind of .”

               Uruha laughed. “Cha-san…. The person you are looking for wouldn’t happen to look like this would they? “.  He pulled out his cell phone and pulled up his favorite press photo of Aoi. Cha looked at the picture and knew instantly that this had to be the man Gackt had described to him. “woo…Dayam! Uh…. I mean... who?” he looked up at Uruha who laughed. “Aoi” Cha’s eyes got wide. “Aoi! As in … Yuu-san? Your bandmate?” Cha’s mouth fell open in an ‘O’ expression.

After a minute of silence Uruha coughed. “Cha-san. Our friends…. Are ...  ** _Idiots_**. Wouldn’t you agree?” Cha blushed. “Yes. They are.”  Uruha touched Cha’s hand. “You do know what I’m talking about don’t you?” Cha ducked his head and nodded. “Gackt … doesn’t like men. But that kiss ... _really_ … rocked his world..” Uruha smiled and squeezed Cha’s fingers. “Cha – I hate to break it to you. But we’re Rock Stars. It’s what we do.” Cha tried not to laugh. “And Aoi – he’s mostly into girls but he’s had two male lovers that I know of. But I’ve never seen him react this way. He’s… He’s… He’s positively bouncy.” Uruha shook his head sadly. “He’s turning into Tigger” Cha raised an eyebrow and glanced down at the cell phone picture still in his hand…. And collapsed bawling in laughter. “Bwahahahahaha! Oh God… give him a black tigger tail…. And you’ve got…. You’ve got… Emo Tigger! …….Hahahahaha!” Cha clutched his stomach in laughter and almost fell off his chair.   Uruha grabbed back his phone. “What ! Let me see that ! …. Oh… God… You’re Right!   You evil beast! I’m never gonna be able to get that image outta my brain now! Emo Tigger…. Bwahahaha!” Uruha and Cha collapsed against each other in gigglefits and gigglesnorts barely managing to not fall on the concrete. While passersby wondered what an “Emo Tigger” was and why it was so funny. Cha finally felt his phone vibrate and he looked at it to find he had a new text message.

“What so funny? ~G~

*Emo Tigger* ~Cha~

“See him yet? Who’s ur friend?” ~G~

*No. Uruha.* ~Cha~

“You know we are going to have to help them in spite of themselves. They both have big egos. At least Gackt does.” Sighed Cha.

“Aoi does too. And they are both vain.” Remarked Uruha.

“Gackt thinks denial is a river in Egypt” smirked Cha.

“We’re gonna have to ambush him, think he’ll forgive us?” asked Uruha.

“Just tell Aoi to keep kissing him while we run away, eventually he’ll remember that he loves Aoi and forget to be mad at us.” Grinned Cha.

               Cha finally parted ways with Uruha, having made plans for the first ambush. Cha and Gackt would come over to Uruha’s house for dinner. It was ostensibly to meet the GazettE, but only Uruha and Aoi would be there. And only Cha and Gackt would be invited. Then once the lovebirds were quite distracted with each other, Cha and Uruha would make a graceful exit and lock them inside. It was a fool-proof plan.

               Uruha threw a turquoise silk shirt down upon the bed…”Here Aoi , try this one on.”  Aoi looked at it curiously.  “Why? Why are you getting me all dressed up like I have a hot date tonight? We’re eating in remember? You just said that Kai and Ruki were coming over for dinner too so why do I have to get snazzed up for them? It’s just us! And why isn’t Reita coming?” Aoi asked putting on the silk shirt anyway. Uruha almost began to drool on himself. Damn but that shirt was freaking hot on Aoi… it was going to fry poor little Gackt’s brain completely! “Reita couldn’t come because he’s out on a date. That’s why. And this was last minute. And what’s wrong with looking nice. Come on, Aoi do it for me? _Please_?” Just then they heard the doorbell ring. “Quick, finish getting dressed while I answer the door.” Uruha grinned and ran for the door.

               Uruha answered the door and ushered his guests inside. He greeted Cha with a hug. Just then Aoi came from the bedroom still buttoning his sleeve. “Hey guys, look at the new shirt Kou-“  -- and stopped midstride as his gaze caught sight of two people who were very much **_not_** Kai and Ruki. His mouth stood open on his half-finished thought as his brain registered the fact that Gackt.  ** _GACKT!... OhmygoditsGackt!_**  Was standing in Uruha’s living room. Wearing black leather pants and a red silk blouse that was open to reveal his famous onyx necklace and that oh so enticing collarbone. Aoi mentally slapped himself.  _Stop it. No inappropriate thoughts allowed. Remember he doesn’t like guys. The kiss was just a fluke. It was probably a dream. You probably just dreamed it. Get a grip!_

               Cha silently slipped his cell phone out of his pocket and not being able to resist the Kodak moment that was a completely flummoxed deer-in-headlights -- _is he drooling?_ – Gackt, Cha snapped a picture. For posterity’s sake. Thoroughly aware that he will be murdered if Gackt ever registers the fact that it has happened. But thankfully Gackt is aware of no universe but Aoi at the moment. Uruha and Cha exchanged grins and a silent “Yussss!” and then proceeded to utterly fail at a silent hi-five which resounded like thunder and which startled the two love-struck rock-stars. Who both let out rather girly yelps. Gackt sent Cha a glare that said _“When we get home I am sooo gonna bend you into a fucking pretzel for this!”_ and Cha shot him a grin in return that said  _“I’d love to see you try sweet-cheeks”_.

               Cha wrapped one arm around Uruha and one around Gackt. "May I introduce Shiroyama Yuu,, also known as Aoi, the eminent guitarist of the Gazette, Uruha’s friend and bandmate . And to my left is… .”  
  
“Gackt” replied Aoi quietly. “His name is Gackt, and you are Cha.”


	5. Operation Seduction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first ambush has been laid, to what consequence?

Chapter 5

EARLIER THAT DAY… “Hey Kai-kuuuuun…. I’ve got a plan and you’re gonna help me with me it!” Uruha exclaimed with an evil grin on his face. Kai eyed Uruha warily. “Don’t say things like that Kou… I’ve , got, and plan should never be in a sentence coming out of your mouth-- it’s like a Japanese horror movie… it never ends well. And it always comes back to haunt me.   But let’s hear it anyway. Otherwise, I’ll get a stress ulcer worrying about what you’ve got planned that you left me out of.” 

Uruha, draped an arm over Kai’s shoulder. “Oh, come on Kai it’s not that bad. See, I’m gonna corner Aoi and get him to ‘fess up about what’s got him so ….so…  _bouncy_. So I figured, I’ll invite you guys over to dinner at my place, but have all you guys back out at the last minute, leaving just me and Aoi. That way he doesn’t get suspicious. See? Perfectly innocent. What could  _possibly_  go wrong? “ 

Kai, chuckled  ** _let me count the ways_**. “I don’t think you’ve been innocent since the third grade. But it sounds harmless enough. Alright. But I want an update, ok? And… Kou, if… it’s drugs…”  Kai heaved a pained sigh.  “… I know a good private rehab place. I helped a friend of mine get there. We’ll ,… We’ll keep it in the family alright? ‘Cause you guys are my brothers, you know that right?” Kai looked down at the ground. Praying that it wasn’t drugs that was the sudden cause of Aoi’s euphoria. Praying it was something innocuous, like love, – or something. Uruha just gave Kai a half hug. “Trust in Aoi, ok Kai? I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. I’m sure it’s something great. So remember to call and cancel at around 7 alright?” Uruha ran the same con on Ruki with the same results. Reita had already been talking about his ‘hot date’ at practice so Uruha didn’t have to ask him to back out. The Trap was all set. Now all Uruha had to do was text message Cha to invite Gackt over for dinner and the two love-birds would finally meet for the second time. And in a more private venue.    _Hehe….let the smexing begin!_  Uruha face-palmed himself and groaned.  _Oh, god I’m pimping my best friend!_

              

               The silence was broken by the sound of two cell phones ringing, Uruha’s and Aoi’s. They both jumped slightly. Uruha answered his phone and spoke for a few seconds, then hung up. “Ruki, can’t come. An old girlfriend just got into town and wants to go drinking so, he’s bailing. Aoi, you’re not answering you’re phone?” Aoi was still staring at Gackt, and hadn’t honestly registered the fact that his phone was ringing. Though the vibration did feel kinda nice near his growing er- _oops_. He was very glad his pants were tight and hoped that Gackt couldn’t tell the effect he was having on him. Aoi had had two male lovers in the past, but he had never had this kind of attraction for someone before, not even with a woman. Their kiss was burned into his brain, and into his groin. He glanced at this phone. The missed call was from Kai, and he noticed that he had a voicemail. He grinned sheepishly for having ignored the call, and been caught staring and listened to the voicemail. It was from Kai, backing out of dinner plans. He said he was tired and had a headache.  _Why is he calling me and not Kou –since Uruha made the invitation? Oh, well. I’ll pass on the message **.**_  “Kai’s not coming either. Headache.” Uruha shrugged. “Well, then I guess it’s just us four then.”

               The four ate dinner and chatted amiably about their careers and music. Though Aoi thought it was awfully suspicious that the table was only set for four people and there didn’t look like there was enough food to have fed six people. He had a sneaky suspicion that Uruha had set this up.  _No wonder he had me all snazzed up in date clothes_. But Aoi couldn’t be mad at his friend. He was sitting next to Gackt and Gackt looked amazing. And he was smiling at Aoi and talking to him. But one question was burning in Aoi’s brain, something he needed an answer to. He just didn’t know if he had the courage to ask it.

 Uruha and Cha exchanged knowing looks and smirks across the table all night long. Gackt and Aoi seemed only to have eyes for each other. They talked as if they were the only two people at the table, and that seemed to be very promising news for their two very concerned friends. When dinner was finished, Uruha motioned to Cha to help with the dishes. “Cha why don’t you help me with the plates, then you can help me bring out the deserts and after dinner cordials while Aoi and Gackt relax” Cha smiled and raised an eyebrow but took the not-so-subtle hint. Aoi and Gackt moved to the living room couch. Uruha and Cha made a pretense of scraping plates and mixing martinis, but in truth both were watching what would happen next. 

There was one spot in Kou’s kitchen that had excellent acoustics of the couch, right by the kitchen sink and with a little window that gave an excellent view as well. It was a little perk that Kou had accidentally discovered shortly after moving in. It was a secret he’d never shared with his bandmates. That he could hear everything they snickered about him when he left the room. He knew they meant well, and often didn’t mean to hurt him, but occasionally what they said had hurt.

               Aoi and Gackt sat in silence for a moment, almost close enough to touch. Aoi’s hand was close to Gackt’s but not touching. Finally Aoi couldn’t take it anymore. He needed to know. Was desperate to know. “Gackt….I need to know. Please. Are you…Are you mad at me? For…For kissing you?” Aoi asked it quietly, almost in a whisper and then he closed his eyes and held his breath, afraid of the answer. Ready for Gackt to explode. Instead he felt Gackt’s fingers brush his own. 

“No…not mad. How can I be mad? Huh, I started it. I just didn’t ….I didn’t expect…I’ve never had a kiss knock me on my ass before.” Aoi risked a peek at Gackt and saw the most beautiful shy smile upon his face. “Gackt, I ….I know you don’t like guys. And I respect that, I do. But… I have to admit…I’d give anything to kiss you again…just one more time. And if you don’t want to that’s ok. I won’t ever ask you again. And I won’t ever tell anyone else what happened. I mean. Well, Uruha kind of figured it out, I’m sorry Gackt. But He’ll take that secret to the grave I swear it. I won’t do anything to harm your reputation. I –“ Aoi’s ramble was interrupted by a long pale finger on his lips.

“Shhh…I think I’d like that. Another kiss I mean.” And then Gackt slid to his knees on the floor in front of Aoi, leaned forward and cradled Aoi’s jaw with his fingertips and kissed him for the second (or was that the third?) time. As before they both felt a slight tingle from Aoi’s lip-ring, and they moaned at each-other’s taste. Gackt opened his mouth and Aoi took that opportunity to slip his tongue inside. They traded gently for dominance of the kiss, Gackt occasionally suckling on Aoi’s lip-ring and both swimming in sensation. Aoi slipped off the couch and settled himself in Gackt’s lap, needing to be closer to him, needing to be touched. Gackt began trailing kisses down Aoi’s jawline, grazing his teeth along Aoi’s jugular making him arch in pleasure and press Gackt’s head into his neck. 

“Ahh! Gackt! …Please….Please let me take my shirt off. Just my shirt. Please…” Aoi whispered heavily, breathlessly. Dizzy from pleasure, on the brink of orgasm already. Positive that there was no way Gackt could not feel his erection, seeing as how he was sitting in the man’s lap, but dammit it felt so good to kiss and be kissed by him. He wanted to feel Gackt’s fingertips roaming his bare skin, the way they had been doing over the silk.

               From the kitchen Cha had come up behind Uruha to watch the shy couple through the tiny kitchen window. Uruha was wearing one of his own ‘Hot Date’ outfits tonight, not because he had a hot date. But because he wanted to show support for his friend. So of course he was wearing extremely short shorts and garters. As they watched Aoi and Gackt kiss, Uruha began playing with his garters. “Gackt is pretty ….limber” Uruha sighed huskily.   
  
Uruha shivered at the hot breath near his ear, “and Aoi can definitely arch his back” Whispered Cha in return.   
  
“We should so not be watching this” they whispered together. Uruha gasped and his head fell back on Cha’s shoulder as he felt long hot fingers interlace with his own and stroke up his garters to the crease of this thigh and back down again.  
  
“Why Yukihiro… are you propositioning me?” gasped Uruha. Lips smiled against the shell of his ear and teeth grazed his earrings making him shudder.  
  
“would you like me to? I’m just as limber as Gackt you know and you’re pretty damn irresistible in these garters.” Uruha was going to say a lot of things, he was going to maybe say _yes_ , or _ok_ , or _really? An old guy like you is as limber as Gackt_? But then a long hot finger traced up the back garter and slipped upward inside his shorts leg to barely tickle his entrance sending a shock of unexpected pleasure through Uruha that made him shudder and made his eyes cross and what he blurted out was “ _Kami-Cha!_  “

“Kami-Chaaaa….I like the sound of that” Cha purred, sending shivers down Uruha’s spine. Uruha felt himself get gently turned around _…”Ahhh! Gackt!... Please..”_  wafted from the living room. Uruha’s ankle was lifted and kissed, then his foot was braced upon a chair. Looking confused at Cha, who smiled a seductive smile at him…”Better access….” He whispered, Before Cha cradled his head and leaned in for a kiss. Uruha felt himself gently pulled forward, and something was placed behind him, and then Cha deepened the kiss. As Uruha leaned back against the hard surface he realized that the sharp edge of the kitchen counter wasn’t quite as sharp anymore. Cha had placed a towel to cushion the edge.  ** _How thoughtful_**. That was as far as thinking went. And then Uruha ceased the ability to think at all, because those long, long, hot fingers were tracing his ankle bones, and tracing up this calf, and following the lines of his garters again and Uruha’s entrance puckered in anticipation of that teasing caress, the nerve endings tingling already.    And all the while Cha’s tongue was doing some caressing of its own, to Uruha’s mouth and the shell of this ear, his jawline and collarbone. And just as those fingers brushed his entrance yet again, Cha bit down a little on Uruha’s jugular, and it was almost enough to make Uruha come right there.   
  
     He let out a strangled “Kamiii-chaaa!!” And unconsciously wrapped his leg around Cha’s hip shoving him forward, forcing Cha’s finger just slightly inside his entrance, only perhaps just past the fingernail. Uruha had been with men in the past, but he had always been Seme. He’d never met the man who’d made him want to switch roles. Tonight Uruha wasn’t so sure. Right now he didn’t care. Right now he felt good, right now he felt fucking amazing, and he held onto Cha shaking, shivering from head to toe. “Don’t move, don’t move…. Just don’t move…oh, god that feels good…I thought that was supposed to hurt? Oh, yeah. That’s cause you have small fingers. And it’s just one….” Uruha babbled in a whisper. Cha licked the spot he bit, and gently moved his finger inside Uruha’s entrance. Not enough to penetrate deeper or to pull out, but just to increase the sensation of its presence. He could feel how tight Uruha was.

“Uruha-chan…does it feel good? Baby, you’re a virgin aren’t you? I won’t hurt you I promise. But I want your first time to be in a bedroom and not against a kitchen counter ok? Will you let me make you feel good baby?”   Cha said these last words while looking into Uruha’s eyes. Uruha was truly beautiful in this moment. Lips swollen and pouty with their kissing, cheeks pink with the flushed heat of lust, mouth open and eyes fluttering in uncontrolled pleasure – If Uruha was more experienced Cha would have loved nothing more than to take him down to the floor right now and make him scream in ecstasy. But he couldn’t.  
  
“ung…fuck….kami…Cha…..don’t stop that….” Uruha panted, and leaned forward, holding Cha closer and laid his head on his shoulder. “ung…feels so good…I’m…I’m always Seme…never…never found…anyone I trusted to …ah! _kayaku…kayaku_ …” Cha smiled and sped up the movement of his finger as he was requested, being careful not to penetrate deeper, because he knew his finger wasn’t lubricated. He could heard Uruha’s whimpers and felt his breath speed up. He pulled back Uruha’s head and captured him in a kiss just as Uruha shouted his release. Cha felt Uruha’s entrance spasm around his finger and once the spasms stopped, he gently removed it and softly caressed the entrance as if apologizing for the unintended intrusion.

Aoi quickly removed his shirt, afraid that Gackt would chicken out. He leaned forward and kissed Gackt, and once again they lost themselves in the sensation of their kiss. Once again Gackt braved kisses across Aoi’s neck and when he reached Aoi’s collar bone, Aoi arched his back to allow him better access.  _God his kisses are feather light, but burn like fire. And when he grazes me with his teeth I can’t help but shudder_. Aoi hips were already beginning to buck of their own accord, but Gackt wasn’t shoving him off his lap yet, so Aoi, just gave himself over to let Gackt explore his body with fingertips and lips and teeth. A strangled  _“Kamiii-chaaa!!”_  broke them from their reverie and caused Aoi to lose his balance and hit his head on the coffee table. Gackt leaned over to help him up.  
  
“Are-“ Aoi smiled and clapped a hand over his mouth. Leaning into his ear…”shhh….listen” sounds from the kitchen drifted toward them.  _“Uruha...Does it feel good…But I want your first time to be in a bedroom and not against a kitchen counter ok?....”_  
  
“Wow, Uruha’s a virgin? But he’s been with guys before!” whispered Aoi into Gackt’s ear.    _“feels so good….I’m always Seme…never found anyone I trusted to…”_ Gackt and Aoi looked at each other.  
  
“We should so not be listening to this.” They whispered together and collapsed into silent giggle fits.  
  
“Aoi, what’s a Seme?” Aoi coughed, “um.. that’s the partner that’s sometimes referred to as the ‘top’. It’s basically referring to …um…who’s ….uh it’s kinda like a in a man/woman relationship the man would be the Seme and the woman the Uke, because the woman um receives penetration you know? But Seme and Uke can also be personality types and relationship roles. Like a Seme also tends to be the more dominant, protector kind of part in the relationship and the Uke tends to a bit more submissive but not always. I’ve met some real spitfire Uke’s and some real laid back Seme’s. It’s not a stereotype. And I know several people in committed relationships that are both Seme and Uke for their partners depending on their mood and the other’s needs at the time. “  
  
Gackt thought about that for a minute. “So … which one are you? If you don’t mind me asking.” Aoi blushed. “I guess I’m like Uruha. Though I’m awfully surprised at that. I’ve always been the Seme. I … haven’t met the right guy that I was attracted to enough that I wanted to be Uke for. I know it’s got to feel good because my lovers …. Were quite – well – they sounded like it felt fantastic and I didn’t think they were faking it. But –“ Aoi blushed again. “ for the right guy, I would try it.” 

Gackt glanced toward the kitchen at the sounds coming from there. He glanced at Aoi, still flushed from their make out session. Gackt remembered the feel of Aoi’s erection as it ground against his own and groaned at the thought, and that missing sensation. No he didn’t like guys. He wasn’t attracted to men. But he was driven to distraction by Aoi, made harder than he had ever been in his life when Aoi climbed into his lap and begged him to let him take off his shirt so Gackt would touch him.  _And if I were to have sex with a man…No. Not any man. Aoi. It’s Aoi I want. If I were to have sex with Aoi… Do I want to be Seme or Uke? Seme… oh god for sure…I want this beautiful flower underneath me. But the way he kissed me. A part of me, a desire. An image. You. You above me, your dark hair all around me. You within me. A dark ecstasy…. Reaching for my heart._    
  
A sudden fear gripped Gackt’s heart. “ I think…” Gackt reached out and stroked Aoi’s cheek, and placed a soft, hesitant kiss upon his lips. Gackt pulled Aoi in a tight hug, and whispered in his ear “Do you think,… someday, …we might be each other’s first?... Because I  _only_  want you. But I’m scared, and I’m not ready to be a Uke yet. I don’t even know if I’m ready to be a Seme. I just know I love kissing you and touching you and holding you. And I want to see you again ok? But I’m scaring myself right now so just let me run me away and don’t be mad. I’m sure Cha will slap me to my senses again real soon.” Then with a sob Gackt got up and ran out the door leaving his shoes and Cha behind.

Aoi sat stunned on living room floor, flushed and hard.  _Did I just make out with Gackt? Did I just have a “homesexual birds & the bees” discussion with him? DID HE JUST ASK ME IF WE COULD BE EACH OTHER’S FIRST!!! Wait – That means he wants to have sex with me! Wait – that means he wants ME to have sex with him! _

_*Aoi Braindeath -------wait for reboot*_

_Hey….Where’s Gackt?_  Aoi looked around, rubbing his sore head, and then it registered _….”I’m scaring myself right now so just let me run away and don’t be mad ok? ….Cha will slap me to my senses again real soon.”_ Aoi looked down, damn he’d cum in his pants again. This was getting to become a habit when Gackt was around.


	6. chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Running away from the truth never really works.

Chapter 6

Cha kissed Uruha quickly “I’ll call you” then ran out the door muttering “Baka!” while trying to put on his shoes and jacket. He ended up hobbling head first into the wall at least twice but did manage to keep his balance. Uruha watched him leave with a smile on his face. How did this happen? A triste between him and Cha? He admired the hell out of the musician… he was practically a legend. And he blushed at the thought of the makeout session they’d just had. Well, he would just have to see how things went. He really hoped Cha could knock some sense into Gackt. He winced at the lost look on Aoi’s face… because if Cha didn’t, he would.  
  
Gackt drove around town, ignoring his phone. Everywhere he looked he caught glimpses of Aoi in the crowd. And each time his heart leapt. He finally pulled over when he almost rear-ended someone because he found himself searching for that pale face he thought he recognized in the crowd instead of the road in front of him. He laid his head on the steering wheel and groaned. This could not be happening to him. He could not be falling for a guy. He thought _maybe if I go to sleep, when I wake up …. I’ll be normal again_. So finally he drove home.  
  
The next morning found him in no better state, a raging morning mahagony that was bordering on painful as images and remembered sensations of Aoi sitting in his lap kissing him flashed in his mind as the perfect solution to his current problem. He told his mind and his dick to mind their own damn business and climbed… delicately …out of bed to take a long… very long… very COLD shower. After catching up on paperwork, he found himself on the internet… before he could stop himself he’d found that he’d pulled up The Gazette’s website and Aoi’s profile. God but his profile picture made things low in his groin purr. His breath quickened. He typed in Aoi’s name and found himself searching for pictures… just to see what kind of model he was…. Riiiiiiggghhhhttt ... that’s what he told himself anyway. He found himself touching the screen, tracing Aoi’s lips-- his jawline. He failed to notice Cha standing behind him, the bandleader having a key to his apartment.  
  
“Here – this is what you’re really looking for… and it says it all if you’ll just listen…” Cha pulled up a youtube fan-video.It was a fan-video that featured clips of Aoi in various music videos all pieced together to a song called “My Favorite Drug” by Porcelain and the Tramps.   
  
Cha leaned down and whispered into his ear. “Watch that and ask yourself if it isn’t saying exactly what you’re feeling right now. Ask yourself if you wouldn’t give almost anything for one more taste. I know you. You’ll tear yourself apart trying to convince yourself not to believe what’s right in front of you. Because you don’t want it to be the truth. Because you’re scared. This is real, and it only comes to us once in a lifetime if we’re lucky. Don’t throw it away. Give it a chance. Don’t be such a  _fucking_  coward. When you decide to stop being such a fucking  _pussy_  about this --  come talk to me. I’ll tell you how to rock his world”   
  
 _The Side effects are sexual…. I’m your favorite drug, just one hit is never enough…_   Cha was right, only two encounters and he knew he was hooked on a drug called Aoi.


	7. chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoi is Gackt's new favorite drug

Chapter 7

Aoi was restless. Remembering the kiss. Remembering what it felt like to straddle Gackt. Wanting, needing to feel his touch again. But he knew that he would have to be patient. All this was new to Gackt… this passion between men… it was more powerful than between a man and a woman. They didn’t have to be careful with each other. They could fully unleash all the desire that threatened to consume them… everything they held back when they were with a woman. If, IF, he could get Gackt to stop fighting himself. He sighed. He fidgeted. He unconsciously caressed himself, retracing the path of Gackt’s fingertips on his body. His bandmates looked strangely at him. A restless, dazed out, sexed up Aoi was not always a good thing. They knew this look… Aoi was in a mood and it wasn’t for playing with guitars…. It was for playing with… other things.  
  
*smack* A box of tissues hit Aoi in the chest breaking him from his daze. “Yo… my friend…. Um…. Like go take care of business so you can concentrate man! Watching you moan and touch yourself like that … it’s…it’s ….”  Reita blushed. “ …. I need a cigarette” Mumbled Reita who grabbed some tissues and bolted for the door. Uruha laughed quietly behind his hand.  _That’s our Aoi_ …. “Well, I guess that means we take a break guys. Aoi…. Get a hold of yourself!” Kai growled and Uruha burst out a snicker which earned him a glare. “I mean get your head out of the bedroom and back in the studio. Go…go…. Take care of business if that’s what you have to do… but come back with all your blood in your … head” He pointed at his own head --  the one on top of his shoulders, while glaring at Uruha daring him to snicker again, though he had a smile on his face.  


Gackt watched the video and just about had a heart attack. He came in his pants just watching it the first time… and when Aoi swiveled his hips on stage…he knew he wanted to experience that skin to skin. He couldn’t really think about who would be Seme and who would be Uke… he just knew he had to see him again, had to touch him, had to taste him. And whatever happened … happened. He played it again, replaying their kiss and the feel of Aoi in his lap, the feel of his skin and muscles under Gackt’s fingertips. He let the words of the song filter into him as he retraced every place that Aoi had touched.  
  
  
He shivered when the song sang the words: _I'll put my nails into your back, yeah you'll feel me like a spinal tap. You want it from me on both knees, but not until you beg me please… the side effects are sexual..._  He opened his eyes breathing heavily and pressed ‘Play’ again.  
  
Oh he was addicted alright, and there was only one cure…. Aoi. He couldn’t fight it anymore. But Cha had called him a coward, and he remembered that Aoi had never allowed a man to …. Um what was that word again…. Be his…. Seme? So. And then Gackt wondered. _But what if he wants me to be the Uke?…_ he looked at the images on the screen _…. I could sooooo get under that. But what does that mean? I mean how do guys do it?_ Gackt groaned. He’d have to ask Cha. And he didn’t want to. But he didn’t want to be a bad gay lover either. I mean if he was gonna be gay.... Because he wasn’t.... Well – only gay for Aoi. If he was going to be gay, then he was going to be the best gay lover out there.  Did it really count if you only liked ONE person of the same gender? Did it really matter? He began to wonder if maybe it didn’t.  
  
He knocked on Cha’s door and waited for him to answer. This had to be THE most embarrassing day of his life that he could ever recall. More embarrassing than his FIRST sex talk. Which wasn’t much of one really.

 “Dad the school needs you to sign this paper giving me permission to take sex-ed.”

“What?”

“It’s a class I have to take, as long as I have your permission, on sex and stuff. It’s for health sciences.”

“You mean the school is gonna give you that talk so I don’t have to? Where’s the paper!”

And that was about as far as his ‘sex talk’ went. That and “Son – don’t forget – sex is like eating Chinese food. It’s not over until you both get your cookies!” Gackt shook his head. It was corny but it did have some wisdom…somewhere... in there.  
  
Cha opened the door, surprised to find a VERY bedraggled Gackt standing on his doorstep. He did not look good. He ALWAYS looked good. The man never stepped foot in public without his appearance being near perfect… so for him to look this bad was significant. “So that video really did a number on you didn’t it? I thought it would…. But Jesus Gackt not this bad! Come on in, before the Papparazzi catch you and spread Rumors that you’re on your death bed. So have you come to your senses yet? Or do I have to shove my size 9 boots up your ass – give you a little prep job?” Cha smirked ushering Gackt inside.

  
Gackt moved dejectedly to the couch and slumped into it. “That song is right Cha. He’s like a drug… I can’t get him out of my mind no matter how hard I try… I can still feel him touching me … taste him on my tongue… and God …. I want more” He buried his face in his hands…”So much more…but I don’t know what’s next... My brain doesn’t process past …. Grinding my body against his the way we do on stage. And oh god… I even thought of “

Gackt touched his mouth and unconsciously sucked on the tips of fingers. He looked up at Cha… blushing furiously… “I don’t want to be a …. Bad lover to him…. I want to know …… how to …. Do it right…and…. What to expect …. If he wants to…. Um… I mean have you? Um…. I mean are you um…… Seme or Uke … is that even the right words?” Gackt just _could not_ look his friend in the face. It was embarrassing enough to have to realize he didn’t even know _how_ to have sex with Aoi, but that he had to ask for advice was seriously bruising his ego.  
  
Cha restrained the urge to let out a victorious “YUSSSS!!!!” and just squeezed Gackt’s hand. “Actually I’ve been both. It depends on my partner. I think you two – you’re both strong willed but protective of your friends, so I think both of you probably have Seme personalities. But that isn’t to say that I haven’t seen you be very loving… and I think a part of you wants to find out what it would be like to be  _under_  Aoi as much as on _top_  of him, am I  right? But there’s no shame in that. You guys just have to try to take it slow. And I’ve got something for you. A present if you will.” Cha handed Gackt a black plastic tube of lotion. He read of bottle and blushed. “Anal-Easy?? Are you fucking kidding me? Eeew no!” Gackt said putting the tube of lotion down on the coffee table.  
  
Cha smiled patiently and placed it back in Gackt’s hand. “Listen to me ok? Now I’m gonna get crude for a minute. Where do you think your partner’s dick is gonna go if not in your mouth? You don’t have a vagina. So there’s only one hole back there to be pleasured. But it’s kind of used to being an exit not an entrance. But it can stretch. I mean we’ve all had those  **“alligator!”**  bowel movements so you know it’s true. And they were a little uncomfortable but satisfying at the same time to pass weren’t they? But when it’s sex it’s different. With the right preparation there’s almost no pain, and _all_ you feel is the pleasure. And it’s such a deep fulfilling pleasure too… it’s like nothing I can describe to you. Except that with the right person…. It’s near heaven. This stuff... well it has a numbing agent in it... because the first time _can_ be quite painful... actually, I won’t lie to you, probably the first few times you have anal sex, depending on how big Aoi is can be uncomfortable.  When you actually go so far as to accept his … penis… in your rectum… it might be a bigger stretch than you’re used to. So it might be uncomfortable at first. This will help… so you don’t feel the burn of the stretch .. only the pleasure of being filled... of that heat reaching deep into you… so you can concentrate on the pleasure and forget your fear over the act. Forget that –  _ **oh my god there’s a dick in my ass**_  – and remember  **that’s it’s Aoi who’s within you**... filling you… giving you what you need if you only relax and let him. And once you do… the orgasm you get from being Uke is like no other you’ll ever get from doing anything else."  
  
"I’ll tell you Gackt… I don’t Uke often, because I’m picky about who I let top me. But ... sometimes… I miss it…. That pleasure. And I’m almost jealous of you... of finding someone to maybe play both roles perfectly with you. I’m so glad you’re coming to your senses. Now keep this with you. I have no doubt you know how to play Seme… nature will just take it’s course there.. Now shoo… go find your drug.. and get your fix.. a good … healthy…INJECTION!”

Cha smirked and patted Gackt on the knee and wandered off to the kitchen leaving Gackt to ponder over what he had just said. He busied himself getting a glass of wine and watched Gackt twirl the bottle of lube in his hands thoughtfully. He saw his eyes close and watched as Gackt’s fingertips ghosted to his lips and down his body. When he reached his groin he shivered and opened his eyes contemplating the bottle in his hand. Biting his lip he pocketed the lube and headed for the door with a determined look on his face.  
  
Cha smiled .. he had just gotten off the phone with Uruha before Gackt arrived. “ Oh my friend….you are soooo gonna get pounced by Aoi-tigger… and maybe that’s what you need… well at least you have an industrial sized bottle of lube… can’t say much for Uruha’s band practice though… guess I better warn him.”  
  
He dialed Uruha’s number. “I thought I should warn you…. A rather determined Gackt is headed your way…. I think rather set on getting pounced by your Aoi-tigger… and with an industrial sized bottle of Anal-Eazy lube in hand… though at this point with the way both of them are acting I’m not sure  _who’s_  going to be doing the pouncing…Gackt or Tigger…I just thought you might want to be warned they might be … um… indisposed for while if they cut loose. Though personally I think Gackt needs to be pounced…. And pinned to the floor… and smexxed senselessly until he surrenders. Of course it doesn’t help that I tortured him with this delicious fan-video I found. I’ll have to show it to you tonight.”  
  
  
Uruha laughed. “Oh, my god. Seriously. If he shows up now… he’s not ONLY gonna get pounced… AND pinned… he’ll DEFINITELY get smexxed senseless till he SCREAMS surrender. We’re supposed to be on break so Aoi can get his – head — back together. Hmm… So I’ll keep a lookout for him then. Maybe pinning Gackt to the floor will blow off some steam. Though just between me and you… Aoi is freaking _hot_ when he’s horny…. Goddamn I’m so hard I could drive nails. It’s a good thing I’m wearing really tight jeans. Maybe if Aoi gets laid he’ll lay off the vibe a little. This is getting painful.” Uruha whined adjusting his pants a little.  
  
“Well, I could always come over and help you out with that… since it seems your practice will be …*cough*…. Somewhat delayed…” Offered Cha in his sultry voice. The knowledge that Uruha was hard and needy made something low in his groin twitch. “Well that sure is tempting... but you’d better not. Hopefully Kai will get mad and cancel practice and then you can make it up to me?” Uruha smiled into the phone even knowing Cha couldn’t see it, but still grinning at the thought that Cha wanted to come over and smex him. “Oh I look forward to it… Uruha…  _very_ … much so”.


	8. chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the first pounce

Chapter 8

Uruha chuckled and hung up the phone, his eyes searching for his horny friend. He needed to make sure Aoi didn’t “take care of business” before Gackt arrived. Spying Aoi’s figure heading up toward’s the roof stairs Uruha grinned. It would be a perfectly – relatively -- private spot for a triste. Now all he had to do was keep Aoi up there until Gackt arrived and then find a way to keep them there until they’d gotten something resolved… or Aoi orgasmed, whichever came first.  
  
Gackt drove at almost breakneck speed for the Gazette studios, afraid that if he hesitated he would chicken out. He told himself that when he found Aoi, he would pull him somewhere private and crush him in a kiss and beg him for forgiveness and promise never to run away again… if only he would take Gackt back… let Gackt touch him, taste him again. If only they could pick up where they left off. Parking his car he put on his cap and sunglasses and walked into the building thankful that he didn’t seem to be noticed on his way in. He signed in at the front desk, simply stating that he was here to visit some old friends among the Label’s bands and maybe check out some of the new ones that had been signed since he left. The Security Guard grinned and nodded, honored to have met THE GACKT in person, and gave him a small map showing all the Band’s practice rooms. Gackt politely thanked the man and forced himself to walk non-chalantly away while his heart raced toward the room marked “Gazette”.  
  
Aoi paced on the roof, even the fresh air wasn’t helping much to clear his head… he missed Gackt terribly. He turned to find Uruha joining him on the roof. “So have you made a date yet with Cha?” He asked trying to distract himself. Uruha blushed, “Sort of… he offered to take me out today if practice gets cancelled because you can’t get your head out of the clouds… ah…but he’s my senpai... someone I respect a lot, It never occurred to me to look at him that way. But after last night… “

Now it was Uruha’s turn to do some squirming. Aoi smiled at his friend… “ Then it looks like we’re in the same boat… distracted and lusting after people we can’t have…. Well… you can  _have_  yours, you just have to wait a few hours… me… I just might have to wait a few YEARS.” Aoi heaved a heavy tension-filled sigh. He really did want to be patient for Gackt, and give him all the time he needed to work his way through his feelings and desires and confusion… but  _dammit to hell_ he wanted him so badly he could scream.  
  
Uruha smirked… “Oh I don’t know about YEARS… more like MINUTES. A little birdy told me that he’s on his way here  _right now_. So what are you going to do about that Aoi? Are you going to let him run away again? Or are you going to make him so senseless with desire that he can’t even remember how to walk let alone run? You know the roof is pretty private… and there’s those old leather couches that Bill and Kevin dragged up here so they could make out with no one walking in on them. I could bring up some Clorox wipes …. And a blanket to cover it with… it’s not the BEST venue for a triste but hey… maybe getting “accidentally” locked up on the roof for an hour will do you both good…. What do you say?”  
  
Aoi grinned a devilish grin… “I like the way you think… it just might work too. But we’ll have to be quick… and how will we get Gackt to come up to the roof?” Uruha laughed, “Don’t you worry about a thing, I’ll handle it, you just worry yourself with figuring out what you’re going to do when he gets here. He might just surprise you, you know… um… do you have a condom? You know… in case things get REALLY fun?”  
  
Aoi shook his head, “Nah but we won’t need them… there’s lots of things I’d love to do to and WITH Gackt… but the things that require a condom…. Require a bed. But I’ll still make it an hour that’ll have him coming back for more. “ Uruha nodded… glad in a way that Aoi would think of that. With Gackt being a virgin.. his first experience (if he was going to play Uke) _should_ be in a bed… but he still almost wished he could be a fly-on-the-couch and watch what was about to unfold. But he knew he couldn’t…instead he set about to get the blanket and bleach needed to disinfect the couch.  
  
Gackt knocked carefully on the studio door of the Gazette’s practice room and blinked as the door was snatched open and a tall man with deep dimples snapped out a “What?”. Gackt bowed slightly and took off his sunglasses… “ ano.. I apologize for interrupting your practice but my bandleader Cha, introduced me to two of your guitarists recently, and I was wondering if I could speak to them a moment? I believe their names were Aoi and Uruha… “ Gackt figured it would look less conspicuous if he asked to speak to both, and he knew Uruha was in on the game of setting the two of them up, so chances were Uruha would find a way for them to have some privacy.

Kai’s eyes went wide as soon as he recognized the voice speaking, now embarrassed that he had spoken so harshly to his Senpai, a practical legend… Gackt. “No no.. it’s quite alright. We were just taking a break…Gackt-sama…” Kai turned his head and grinned at Reita while he mouthed  _Omg it’s GACKT!!._ “Reita have you seen Aoi or Uruha? “ Kai asked in a sweet voice completely different from the grumpy Kai he’d been all morning. Perhaps this visit from someone important would cheer Aoi up so that he could concentrate on practice. Reita nodded his head… “ I think they headed up to the roof… “  
  
Gackt nodded toward Reita and thanked him, bowing out of the practice room and began searching for the stairs.

  
As it happened Gackt just barely missed Uruha sneaking into the dressing room to steal a few travel pillows. He dug around looking for something that could be used as lube in short notice… contrary to what Aoi said.. Uruha was still rooting for someone getting laid… but all he found was a tube of cinnamon lipgloss, shrugging his shoulders he sighed. “beggers can’t be choosers and.. it’s better than nothing in a pinch” with a grin he bolted for the stairs, just making it about 30 seconds before Gackt.  
  
Uruha was in the midst of fluffing the blankets on the couch when the stair door opened, and Uruha ducked behind the couch.. uncertain who would be coming up here at this hour of Day. He didn’t have long to wonder though as he heard a soft exclamation come from Aoi’s lips that made Uruha smile… _Bingo… now all I have to do is lock you two up here for a while and let nature take it’s course_ … Uruha snuck over to the stairway entrance trying not to snicker as he watched Gackt practically stalk toward Aoi. With a quiet click he closed the door and wedged a steel bar preventing it from opening from outside. Now all he had to do was wait … he prayed good luck for his friend that everything would turn out all right.  
  
Gackt opened the stairwell door and was temporarily blinded by the sunlight… only to find the object of his obsession right there before him… almost surrounded in a halo of light. “Aoi… “ the name fell from his lips like a prayer and he stepped forward with a purpose, determined that once he crossed that distance… he was never going to have to make this trip again… he would find a way to make this work or die trying.  
  
As the door opened Aoi turned to see who had joined them on the roof… still uncertain in his mind what he was going to do once Gackt arrived. Or how they were going to get him to fall for their trap… but all those thoughts flew right out of his mind as the vision focused on … Gackt standing there ... looking sexy but bedraggled. Like he hadn’t slept well… like he’d been as distracted by Aoi as Aoi was by him. He took a step toward him, even though he had meant to stay still and make Gackt close the distance… but as soon as his name left Gackt’s lips he knew he had to meet him half-way. It was only fair… Gackt was afraid and it was up to Aoi to ease his fears. Love was as much about trust as it was about passion.  
  
“Gackt… “ he murmured in return and by the time their bodies met the door was already shut and barred behind them without either being aware of anything but each other. Gackt meant to say he was sorry for running away… meant to say he’d do anything if only Aoi would give him another chance …. All that pretty speech he’d practiced in the car. But as soon as they were close they each reached for the other and their lips met in a heated crush of desperation that only comes from realizing you’ve almost lost something vitally important to you.  
  
Gackt held Aoi’s head to his own with one hand and the other wrapped around his waist holding him close, as if AOI might be the one to try to run away. Gackt moaned a deep whine of need and satisfaction as Aoi’s hands roamed his back and likewise held his head close, Aoi plundering the treasures of his mouth with expert care till he tilted his head back silently begging Aoi for more. He reached down and shrugged off his suit jacket and quickly stripped off his skin-tight t-shirt leaving him naked from the waist up. Panting he reached forward and pulled Aoi into another heated kiss, while his fingers sought to undo the buttons on his shirt… in between kisses and pants Gackt whispered  
  
“You’re like a drug I can’t get out of my mind, off my tongue, god I can still feel you under my fingertips and I want to… god I **_need_** to touch you again. To taste you… I promise I won’t run away this time… Please Aoi… can you take me back? I’m sorry I’m an ass, and I’m going to try really hard to be good to you…. To be everything you need me to be… even a good lover. I just… well I might need some help with that. Will you teach me Aoi?  _Will you teach me how to be yours_?”

Aoi almost forgot his conversation with Uruha and nearly pushed them both to the ground when Gackt stripped off his shirt.. _hot damn_ but that man had some rockin’ abs. His own body shivered with anticipation as Gackt began trying to undress him as well… it seemed at least that he’d gotten over some of his shyness and Aoi wondered what had happened to change things, because he liked where this was headed. Helping Gackt out he quickly shucked out of his shirt, gasping at Gackt’s declaration, panted through kisses along his throat and pierced ear, as he suckled on Aoi’s lip-ring having pulled their bodies close enough that it was possible for both to feel the effect they had on each other just from their passionate kisses. Both were rock hard and straining in their pants, both unconsciously grinding against the other, seeking friction, and both moaned at how good that felt.  
  
“It’s alright Gackt…. I understand. We’ll take as much time as you need… but ah… why don’t we move over to the couch? There’s an old couch up here, behind that column, so if someone comes up here they won’t get an eyeful neh?” Aoi brushed a piece of hair away from Gackt’s eyes….”and I feel the same way Gackt… I want to be a good lover to you if you’ll let me… I want to make you feel so wonderful. You just have to learn to trust me and let yourself feel, and just forget that I’m a guy okay? Just concentrate on ME…. On AOI… and we’ll get through this together alright?”

Gackt nodded, his mind quickly becoming numb with passion…. He didn’t know where this was headed, but he wanted more of it... Aoi looked so damn beautiful in the setting sun.

Aoi led them over to the blanket covered couch…. After picking up their discarded clothes, concerned that if for some reason Uruha’s plan failed and someone opened the door looking for them they would see the discarded clothing and come looking for an eyeful. If this was going to be the last make-out session they had in a while, then Aoi wanted it to be one to remember… he wanted to push things … maybe even a little too far, and right then he wanted to make Gackt pay a little for leaving him stranded and he knew that this time Gackt had nowhere to run.  
  
Backing Gackt up to the couch, Aoi distracted him with a kiss while he unzipped the back of his skirt and let it fall to the ground leaving him clad in only his thin silk boxers. Then his fingers quickly popped the snap and zipper of Gackt’s own pants and shoved them down his thighs making him squeek with indignity and surprise before Aoi was pushing him to sit down and climbing into his lap. He shuddered and cursed softly into Gackt’s ear as he felt their hard cocks rub each other through the thin silk of his boxers. “aahh.. fuck…” he whispered hoarsely and glanced down between them to see Gackt in all his nude glory standing proud and flushed with desire.. already leaking pre-cum. “ _ **You go commando**_ _????_ ” he managed to strangle out before his lips were captured again in a hungry kiss.  
  
Gackt was lost in the passionate kiss Aoi assailed him with … so lost he failed to notice when the other had shucked his skirt… and it wasn’t until he felt the cool evening air caress his ass cheeks that he realized the other had just undressed him, and he started to protest. But then he found himself pushed back and the couch edge forced him to sit and then there was an alluring and sexy… flushed and horny ... Aoi in his lap and all thought processes screeched to a halt. The silk of Aoi’s boxers felt like a sinful carress on his thighs and when the hard heat of Aoi’s shaft occasionally brushed against his own he couldn’t help but moan and buck his hips up… his body seeking by instinct what his mind didn’t know what to do.  
  
He didn’t even register the question, he just pulled Aoi toward him and ravished his mouth once again… let his hands start roaming the expanse of soft smooth skin and taught muscle. His finger dipped beneath the waistline of Aoi’s boxers by instinct to tease the crack… not even near the entrance but instinctively knowing this spot was sensitive to touch. When Aoi arched his back he took advantage and pulled Aoi’s hips more flush with his own and lavished his collarbone with attention, moaning Aoi’s name over and over again as his hips began to grind upward against the friction of Aoi’s silk-covered shaft. While his hands roamed Aoi’s torso, they had yet to brave contact lower than his hip grooves, though his touches were becoming more and more desperate. He needed something… he just didn’t know what…  
  
Aoi moaned and mewled at the attention his body was receiving under Gackt’s mouth and hands, and he didn’t fail to notice how needily Gackt unconsciously ground up against his shaft… he smiled as he gained an idea of just what Gackt needed in that moment to find his release and perhaps…. Become more comfortable with their passion. If only they had some lube. His hands braced themselves on the couch beside Gackt’s thighs as he arched his back to provide Gackt more access to his torso and as he ground his own hips harder down upon Gackt… giving him some of the friction he sought. His hand landed on Something in Gackt’s pocket, that felt like it might be a bottle of lotion and Aoi blindly fished it out… hoping it was. He smiled as he saw what it was…  
  
Reaching between them he unleashed himself from the confinement of his boxers and squirted a generous amount of lube on his palm before he took a very surprised Gackt in hand and began to stroke him... scooting closer he rocked his hips until he was fisting both of their erections and moaning as if Gackt were fucking him for real. “oh… god.. fuck.. Gackt…” Aoi moaned as he held onto Gackt’s shoulder and licked, sucked and nibbled on his neck shaking with too much pleasure to do anything else.  
  
Gackt was about to go insane just from kissing and sucking on every inch of skin he could touch and taste… and the friction between their groins was … wonderful but frustrating… he wanted more… _needed_  something more but was afraid to ask because he didn’t know what he wanted. Just MORE. And suddenly a cold slick hand was fisting his cock, quickly warming up and almost before his brain could register how expertly that hand handled him… Aoi’s hot NAKED cock was brushing against his own… sending electric shocks straight to his balls and into his groin… Aoi’s hand and his rocking hips, his scent, his taste, his lips and teeth on his skin was too much. Just as Aoi cursed and moaned his name, so Gackt cursed and moaned his… desperately holding Aoi to him and bucking his hips up frantically into Aoi’s hand until he came with a scream.. “ god… aoi.. aoi… AOI!!” only seconds later Aoi followed, he too screaming Gackt’s name. His own hot seed mixing with Gackt’s to slick their abdomens.  


Gackt’s whole body trembled… never in his life did he ever expect to cum so hard from just … what had to amount to foreplay. Gackt’s hand trailed over Aoi’s back, and over his butt... caressing the crack lightly before pulling him even more snuggly against him and embracing him, not caring in the least that they were still covered in each other’s seed. He kissed Aoi softly on the lips and looked him deep in the eye. “ That was amazing…and  if that’s just the start of what we can experience together then… I want to try it  _all_  with you. I don’t care what people will think… I still don’t like men… but I…. I think  **I LOVE you**. And that’s all that matters…” Gackt wrapped his arms around Aoi and laid his heart-weary, lust-sated head upon his shoulder. Aoi patted Gackt’s hair and allowed himself to be held… much more sated than he had expected and a far better hope for their future than he had imagined was possible this early in their romance when He and Uruha had hatched this plan today.  _Now You’re Mine… And I am Yours_  He thought. _ **“I love you too, you stubborn BAKA!**_ ” he whispered. _ **"But don't you dare try to run away from me again.. "**_

  
  
 


	9. chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Date clothes emergency, Ruki to the rescue

Chapter 9

Gackt sighed in frustration. Because of their mutually insane work schedules, he hadn’t been able to see Aoi again since their amazing roof-top adventure. He longed to feel Aoi in his arms again, and to discover what new pleasures the raven guitarist would show him.  
  
His bandmates were all full of giggles because their usually strict leader-sama had been floating on cloud 9 for days, and hadn’t even tried to trick anyone into any humiliating bets he knew he couldn’t lose. It was rather uncharacteristic of him, and even though only Cha knew the real reason, the consensus was that he must have found some kind of new romance which always made THEM happy because it made HIM happy.

  
Gackt looked at his large bed and sighed at the fashion bomb that appeared to have exploded there. Probably close to a half million in high end couture and not a damn thing was suitable for their date tonight. He looked at his watch and almost panicked. He only had 8 hours to get ready! He pulled out his phone and hit ‘speed dial 2’ and waited anxiously for the other to pick up the phone. As soon as he heard the click of the call being answered he didn’t even give the other a chance to speak. “Chaaaa!!!!! You gotta help me! I don’t have ANYTHING TO WEAR!!! You gotta help me go shopping!”  
  
Cha laughed… “ 3 walk-in closets and you have NOTHING to wear? Now that’s an oxymoron.. or just a moron? Um… don’t answer that. Calm down Gackt-kun we’ll figure it out. You know he already likes you, so you don’t have to worry so much about impressing him. “  
  
Gackt stomped across the bedroom in a huff, searching for the perfect shoes. At last he found a pair that seemed to suit his idea for the evening, now if only he could find the _rest_ of the outfit. Cha was chuckling in his ear at all the grumbling he was doing under his breath. Cha knew he wasn’t as fashion conscious as his friend, so It surprised him when Gackt called to ask him to go clothes shopping. As much he admired a certain petite brunette’s sense of style, He felt that the person in question was far too laid back to provide the right insight to tonight’s preparations.  
  
Shaking his head, his thoughts drifted toward another petite glam and an evil grin spread across his face. Yes, he would be PERFECT for dragging along on a shopping trip for CLOTHES. “I’ll call you back Gackt… with a place to meet us” Before Gackt could sputter a reply he hung up and dialed another number.

  
A sleepy tinged honey voice answered the line “moshi-mosh?” Cha smiled as he imagined the red haired beauty stretching sleepily with tousled hair. The image went straight to his groin. “ good morning poohbear… did you dream well?” He asked.  
  
Uruha rolled over and indeed stretched like a cat, a yawn widening into a smile. “ I was.. but the real thing is so much better than a dream.” Cha hummed in agreement, the idea that Uruha may have been dreaming of him was stimulating. One of these days he intended to wake up beside the beauty and see just how happy he was in the mornings.  
  
“Sometimes it feels like a dream that I even met you. You have no idea how much I don’t want to wake up. Listen didn’t you say your vocalist was due for another shopping spree?” Cha asked with a hopeful voice.  
  
Uruha chuckled. “Yeah, he’s been bitching that his wardrobe is ‘so last week’, he actually threw a cupcake at me when I commented that that was only because he BOUGHT it a week ago. Why?” Now the conversation was making him curious.  
  
Cha laughed and nodded, Ruki-chan would be perfect. It sometimes amazed him at how much they had in common in dealing with personalities in their respective bands and friends. “Gackt is having a minor meltdown, because he says that despite 3 walk-in closets, he has NOTHING to wear to their date tonight. “  
  
Uruha nodded, “ Well, I’m sure Aoi would LOVE it if he wore NOTHING to their date, but then so would the vultures. “ He grimaced at the thought of all the tabloid drama that would come out of such an event.  
  
Cha nodded, chuckling…. He could just picture the cameras and cell phones clicking. Of course Gackt could be a photo-hound at times, and a bit of an exhibitionist but he just didn’t picture Aoi as being quite so into the attention. This date definitely called for something… sultry and understated, full of potential.  
  
“So do you think we can borrow your resident fashionista for a day of shopping for the perfect date outfit?”  
  
Uruha smiled , “ Oh yeah, Ruki would love to go shopping, I think the only thing he loves more than shopping for himself , is dressing other people up. I’ll call him right now. Do you want to meet up somewhere ? I know a great place, it’s this awesome bakery.. ‘ _breakfast at tiffanie’s’_? They have the BEST desserts and coffee… “ Uruha sighed at the very thought of one their mouthwatering pastries and strong cup of coffee.  
  
“Mmmm… that sounds great, and even though Gackt isn’t much for sweets, I could sure go for something. But should you really get Ruki within a 100 YARDS of caffeine?”  
  
Uruha chuckled, “Oh, I don’t know, I think Aoi’s more the one you’d have to worry about….”  
  
Cha mumbled sagely… “ I dunno Kou… isn’t that like a toss-up between a jacked up Tigger and aJacked up Hammy? Frankly I think I’d rather deal with the Tigger. I don’t know how you do it on a daily basis… you must be a saint!”  
  


Uruha started guffawing with laughter until it hurt to breathe…. “ stop, stop.. Please! I’m gonna pee myself! Oh god.. it hurts to breathe..and now that image is burned into my brain. Ruki as Hammy the squirrel… and oh shit! It fits! He loves squirrel nut taffy!” Again Uruha was laid waste by a fit of giggles.  
  
“aww.. I’m sorry baby. Listen, how about you come over to my house after we finish getting those two off on their date? I’ll make you some dinner and draw you a nice hot bubble bath to soothe your aching tummy? “ Cha shivered at the thought of Uruha all bubbly and slick and had to adjust his pants.  
  
“That sounds like an amazing plan. Ha, if only our friends knew what we talk about… they’d probably kill us. “  
  
Cha nodded. “mm. I know what you mean, listen call me when you get set up and let us know what time to meet you okay?... _I miss you_ … I can’t wait to see you again.”  
  
Uruha sighed. “I’ll call you soon . I can’t wait to see you again too. We’re going to have so much fun watching them make divas of themselves.” Uruha was still snickering slightly when he called Ruki, who wanted to know what was so damn funny that early in the morning and why was he bothering Ruki with it. Uruha just snickered and replied “Hammy on Redbull”.  
  
Ruki, who hadn’t seen ‘Over the Hedge’ thankfully didn’t get the reference. “I haven’t had my coffee yet Kou – don’t make me KILL you. Why are you calling me???”  
  
“Well, grumpy… I was calling to see if you’d do me a favor and go shopping… “ Uruha barely got the word shopping out before Ruki perked right up. Apparently the word ‘shopping’ had the same effect on Ruki that brewing a pot of coffee had for most others.  
  
“SHOPPING?? Did you say shopping?  **Please**  tell me it’s for something fun like sex toys or clothes…”  
  
Uruha laughed… “Isn’t that like the same thing for you Ru? I’ve seen you get hard over a good sale on a pink sequined blouse…”  
  
Ruki huffed indignantly. “Hey! That blouse looked awesome on me and it was 70% off!!!”  
  
Uruha couldn’t help but chuckle, Ruki WAS very serious about clothes, and he was as keen (and as viscious) as a transvestite when it came to sniffing out a sale.  
  
“Well, as it happens, it IS for clothes. DATE clothes, for our Senpai Gackt-san, at Senpai Cha-san’s request. I recommended you since you’re our resident clothes hound. “  


Ruki perked up, “ooh, DATE clothes? So what kind of date? First date, casual, seductive, posh? … what’s the intended vibe and scenario?”  
  
Uruha smiled, knowing he’d found just the right person. Ruki might be loud, but he had great taste when it comes to setting a mood with grand style. “Hmm… first date. Very good first impression. Not too revealing,…. seductive but.. a gentleman not a gigolo. You know? Does that make any sense?”  
  
“ooh… “ Uruha could just picture Ruki rubbing his hands together in sinister glee. “Now THAT’s something I can handle. And I think I have just the idea too. _Holy Crap_... I get to dress up GACKT!... *mumblemumble too*”  
  
Uruha shook his head, knowing full well what was likely running through Ruki’s deviant mind and what he was mumbling to himself. Dressing Gackt UP, also meant watching him undress, and he had no doubt Ruki would find a way to squish himself into the small cubicle with the G-man just to ‘help’.  
  
“Just remember though, he’s spoken for, so hands OFF! He’s going on a date remember?”  
  
Ruki blew a raspberry into Uruha’s ear. “Very funny, and for that matter keep your gloves off Cha too, he’s MINE. “ the last bit slipping out in a rather possessive growl.  
  
“Oh, my my! You’re such a sadist! Sending me shopping with two gorgeous Senpai I can’t grope. But, I’ll try to behave, I promise.” Ruki crossed his heart, even though he knew the other couldn’t see it. He loved to harass his bandmates, but it was all in fun. He loved to see them in love, it was such an inspirational event. He wondered who Aoi’s new ladylove was? He sure as hell was zoned out enough lately but the bitch must be pretty cold. Or else Aoi would have been laid by now.


	10. chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introducing Miromi

Chapter 10

Aoi stretched slowly as he reluctantly climbed out of bed. He was having the most lovely dream… a dream where he gave Gackt a nosebleed from desire. He was determined to make the man so riled up he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of Aoi. Aoi thought about what he wanted to wear tonight. 10% innocence and 90% seduction. He’d already had his eye on a pair pants he’d been wanting to buy, and he hadn’t had a chance yet to wear the new boots he’d bought a few months ago, and that gave him the start of an idea.  
  
He dialed his stylist and begged her to come over for a house call, she would meet him at 2pm and help him with his hair. Meanwhile he grabbed up his keys and headed for the door. There were a few things he still needed to pick up to complete his drop-dead outfit.  
  
Meanwhile, Gackt was pacing in the coffee shop, anxious for Ruki to get there. Finally the tiny bombshell arrived and greetings were exchanged. It took some prying to keep Ruki from ordering a coffee drink with 3 shots of espresso in it. They settled on giving him a tall fruity, colorful drink that was supposed to be full of B-vitamins and good for his skin (and decaffeinated). Ruki peered up at his victim. "hmm... I think I know just the place..."  
  
Knowing just where he wanted to end up, didn't keep Ruki from going the scenic route. That is, in Ruki lingo… shopping for himself. Of course he found a fabulous pair of gold leather pants before Gackt lost his temper and demanded that they finish finding his date outfit. Ruki grumbled, because he’d wanted to find something equally as amazing to go with the pants, like a blouse, shoes and accessories, but he caved. Mostly because Gackt is scary when he glares.  
  
At last they reached Ruki’s destination. A very small, hole-in-the-wall, Taylor shop in Shibuya. It might not look like much, but the taylor was a well-known favorite of Ruki’s. He’d been able to make some of the best suits Ruki had ever worn, comfy and flashy and he never failed to get tons of compliments on them. What they needed tonight was smoky seduction. They needed to bottle Gackt’s dominance into a sexual package that would turn heads without necessarily turning on cameras.  
  
“ah.. Miromi-san…. I have a challenge for you my dear…” Ruki cooed as he entered the small establishment. A tall thin asian man who looked a bit like a Technicolor rainbow had vomited all over his shirt sashayed toward them. “ooh Ruki-than, what a deli-thuth drink of water you’ve brought me. Ith he thingle? You know you owe me right? You thtill haven’t thet me up with any of your thexy friendth….”

  
Ruki gave a little shudder, because though he loved Miromi’s skill, the lisp did get a little old after a while. He’d made a practice of finding ways to get Miromi to talk without using words that contained an ‘s’. today however was all about “s” words, so he’d just have to hope Gackt could deal.

“Well, um… sorry about that Miromi, but I don’t think any of my friends are uh… single at the moment. But the moment I find a friend who’s um…. Looking for someone as  _creative_ as you I’ll let you know okay? This by the way is … GACKT! He’s got a hot date tonight, a  _first_ date, so we have to make a lasting impression okay? I was thinking something smoky, sexy, and a bit understated. I want to bottle all that dominance into one, tall, sexual package. You know? Like … _‘take me on… if you dare…_ ’ kind of attitude. Think you can handle it? Oh! And we need it in a couple of hours..”  
  
  
Miromi circled Gackt like a shark in a tank. “theductive you thay? He certainly doeth look like a thexual beatht. Hmm… you know I got a bolt of dark grey thilk that is jutht thinful!! I think it will hug hith body jutht right. Letht get him meathured thall we? “  
  
With every lisp both Gackt and Ruki physically winced, though Miromi was in his own world now and didn’t even notice. He tugged Gackt forward then went and locked his door. Miromi was very conscientious of his patrons privacy, and always locked his doors when doing measurements. His loyal customers knew what it meant if his doors were locked during business hours and they just came back later.  
  
He motioned for the men to follow him and he motioned Gackt behind a dressing screen. “Pleathe take off your clothing , down to your underwear if you pleathe.” Gackt blushed and coughed, hesitating without heading for the screen. “I uh… I don’t have any on. I um… I usually go commando or wear thongs…”  
  
Miromi and Ruki both turned red and fanned themselves before recovering. “Well then, pleathe undress and … well… “ Miromi shrugged… “We’re all girlth.. I mean MEN here…. It’th not like we haven’t theen it all before!” He motioned for Gackt to undress behind the screen. Gackt shrugged and went behind the screen to undress. It wasn’t like he hadn’t pranced around nude at home in front of his bandmates. But being nude in front of strangers, one of whom was going to be  _touching_ him was a different story altogether.  
  
When he came out both men gasped. Miromi fanning himself and letting out a “mercy!” and Ruki just emitting a small squeek of envy. No doubt about it, Gackt wasn’t kidding when he’d dubbed his tool “magnum” … the man was  _seriously_ hung. One good thing about a gay taylor, is that he knows how to show off the best features of a man, his bulge in front and his luscious ass in back. He took his time with measurements , perhaps a little  _too much_ time, but in the end he had the contours of Gackt’s nethers measured to within the millimeter.  
  
Gackt was somewhat humiliated. He’d never been measured while squatting, sitting, and with one leg hiked up like Captain Morgan. He wondered if all that was  _really necessary_ or if the fruity Taylor was just getting his grope on. In the end though The silk cupped him lovingly and slid along parts of his body that had never been caressed so intimately by fabric before. It made him shiver to think of Aoi touching him the way the fabric was and he became half-aroused at the thought. A predicament which only made Miromi smile with self-satisfaction. “Ah that ith my thpecialty,-- couture that theduces the wearer ath well ath the obtherver. Come now, Gackt-than, we will meathure you now for the  _retht_ of the outfit.”

  
Gackt endured another 2 hours of measurements and try-ons before the suit was finally finished. He was dressed in a light grey dress shirt that accentuated the blue in his contacts, making his eyes brighter. The suit itself was a dark grey silk that hugged his body in all the right places. Giving him enough room in the shoulders to be comfortable and without constricting his movements in any way.  It appeared to be well fitted in a way that only a custom tailoring job can do. The shirt was also a breathy silk,that felt like nothing against his skin and teased his nipples to near-tautness. He was definitely going to be in a state when he finally saw Aoi. The suit even matched the black snake-skin shoes he’d picked out.

  
“Now all I need to do is find something to do with my hair….” He said, smiling at himself in the mirror, posing a little. He felt tall and bad-ass like he did in that cheezy vampire film he’d been in, when he was strapped with all those guns.  
  
Ruki spoke up again, once he was able to produce spit. At first he’d just drooled, but then once the whole package was in place… and _what a package_! His mouth had gone dry and he had to resist the urge to start humping Gackt’s leg like a sex-fiend Chihuahua. _Maaaan but whoever was going out with Gackt tonight was one lucky bitch._ “um… how about slicked back like a sexy gangster? I mean you do look kinda mob-boss right now.” Gackt smoothed back his hair and gave a small laugh, the tiny singer had a great eye for pulling it all together. “yeah, I think that will do perfectly”.  
  
Meanwhile, Aoi was quickly pulling his own outfit together. He wondered if it was a bit too… well… slutty, but then he decided that maybe that was what Gackt needed to get his head, and his libido, going in the right direction. At first Aoi looked at a pair of open-sided pants, but finally decided on a pair that were more skirt-like and wouldn't obscure his boots too much. They were slung low and hugged his thighs but were slit from the knee down and flared open.   With those he decided to wear the red-and-black knee high boots he'd bought a few months earlier, changing out the red ribbons for black.   Next he considered what to wear above the sleek pants. He wanted to leave some of his tummy showing, his hip grooves too, because no doubt about it he was going to get on the dance floor and show Gackt some moves guaranteed to blow his mind.  
  
At last he came across an elegant white lace shrug. It was one of those half-jackets, that are usually worn over something else so that your shoulders aren’t bare, and it was short enough to bare his midriff the way he wanted. He tried it on and it seemed to be the perfect contrast. All that delicate lace lending a naughty bit of innocence to contrast with the pure sin down below. But he couldn’t find anything to wear _underneath_ the shrug, so for the time being he decided to head home so he would have time to get his hair done and shampooed without smelling like hair dye on his date.  
  
  
Aoi arrived at his apartment almost the exact same time as his stylist. As he laid out his date outfit, Kat laughed. “oh my… somebody is planning to get fucked unconscious tonight… too bad it’s not me” Aoi laughed and gave her a hug. “well, that _is_ the idea… but I doubt it’s gonna happen. My date is… well…. Sort of a virgin…” Kat gaped at him, and coughed. “She’s a freaking  _virgin_ and you’re wearing  _that?_.”  
  
Aoi put a finger to her lips in the universal sign of “shhh” sign.   “My date isn’t a girl, it’s a guy, and he’s never _been_ with a guy before. So I’m trying to help him get over his uh… shyness.” Kat shook a ‘shame on you’ finger at Aoi and urged him into the bathroom. “Well, lets go melt his brain then Aoi… as only you can. So what’s the devious plan then? Why the desperate need for a house call? You don’t have any split ends….”  
  
Aoi smiled evilly in the mirror at her. “I want to tip my hair in red, to match my boots. And I want to make my make-up special too. Smoky eye shadow tipped in red to bring out the red in my hair and red lip gloss. I was thinking about a French-manicure on my nails too, black with red tips. What do you think?”

Kat thought a minute and shook her head. “I think that might be overdoing the red& black thing a bit too much. The hair and eyes, I can see, but your fingers are different. Maybe you could do black with white tips, to kind of match the jacket right? What are you going to wear under the jacket?”  
  
Aoi thought a moment and agreed with Kat. It would kind of tie it all together, to do it that way. “I don’t know, I was kinda thinking maybe that corset from the ‘viscious’ photoshoot, but then I thought just having bare skin would be kind of wicked too. I mean people wear those fishnet shirts sometimes, so it’s not much of a stretch to show that much skin.”  
  
Kat started pinning up Aoi’s hair, then got out her supplies to start dying the tips. “Wow... that will certainly make a statement. If he doesn’t die of a nosebleed or jizz his pants on the spot… I almost pity the guy” Aoi laughed and let her get to work.  
  
At last the job was done and Aoi stood in front of the mirror admiring his new locks.  Kat had even helped him fix his eyeshadow,  which perfectly matched his hair and boots. At last Aoi sighed and looked at the clock. It was 5pm, only 2hrs until their date and already he could feel the tension in the pit of his belly. Would Gackt like the outfit? Would he be disappointed? Could they really make this work?

  
 

 


	11. chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the first date, passion ignites

Chapter 11

Gackt gave Miromi a hug and paid him a handsome price for the suit. But it was well worth the price, since the quality was outstanding and it had been an extreme rush job. He pocketed Miromi’s business card. It was always good to know the best people in any field. And having someone local who could handle such a monumental task with no notice… was extremely valuable. “Ruki-san…. I’m grateful. You really surprised me today, but it was well worth it. Miromi-san is amazing… even if his speech is … “ Gackt shuddered.  
  
“Yeah, I’ve tried to make a practice of holding conversations that don’t require the letter ‘s’ in any shape or form. It’s more difficult than you think. He’s my little secret, but he is amazing. Hey! I’ll bet he can make me the perfect blouse to go with those awesome pants I bought today… I’ll have to go back and talk to him. YOU go have an amazing date tonight. Whoever he or she is, is a very lucky person. Not everyone would go to such lengths to look amazing for a first date you know… “  
  
Gackt smiled and waved goodbye to Ruki. He knew just the car he wanted to rent for their date. Something low and sexy, that fairly purred… The SSC Ultimate Aero . And he knew there was only one place in all of japan who had one. He just hoped it was available. 10 minutes later he had secured the car. It would be delivered to his house by 6pm.  
  
Aoi looked at himself in the mirror, admiring his new look. His hair was dramatic, and he wondered what his fans would think. He hoped they would like the change. He carefully put on his outfit and stood in front of his full-length mirror. He wore the lace shrug without anything under it, exposing his chest and a good portion of his belly button. He … **_was_** … sin and sex and red lollipops all rolled into one. He snapped a picture of himself and sent it to Uruha.

  
 _Think he’ll like it? Or is it too much?_. ~ Aoi

  
Uruha texted him back.  _fuck man, warn a body before you do something like that. I almost wrecked my car.. hot damn Aoi-kun… I think I jazzed my pants ;)_  
  
Aoi laughed, he would take that as an approval of his outfit. It was definitely… much. But hopefully not too much. He carefully took the outfit off, knowing he was going to be pacing and didn’t want to the get the outfit all sweaty. Around 6:30 he put it back on, checked his makeup in the mirror and spritzed on a light cologne. It was something subtle and light. He was finally ready for his date.  
  
Gackt had been nervous when he got home, He was still worried about being able to pleasure Aoi. He had no experience with being with a guy except for the things he’d already done with Aoi. But he knew that there was more to an intimate relationship between men than he had the experience of. Knew that there was more his own body wanted, needed… but couldn’t define. He had a few hours to kill yet, and then he remembered the porn that Cha had left for him.

“ think of it as sexual education..”  _yeah right_. Gackt settled down and put the video on. All the men who were the “bottoms” or as Aoi called them “Uke” seemed to be of a similar body type and all seemed to be rather pretty. The men who were on “top” or “Seme” as Aoi had called them were all… well.. fairly ugly and wore sunglasses. But then he wasn’t really watching it to watch their faces. He was watching it to see what he was supposed to DO. Some of what he saw made him fairly nauseated, but he did pick up a few things. He’d had women give him blow jobs in the past, so he knew that that felt good. He got hard just thinking about Aoi sucking on him, and he was fairly certain he could bring himself to pleasure Aoi that way in return.  
  
But it was the anal play that gave him pause. He just couldn’t sit there and watch it and imagine what it was like. The men  _seemed_ to enjoy being touched and  _licked_ back there. Gackt had cringed when he saw a man do that to another, licking or kissing someone back there wasn’t anything he would have  _ever_ imagined someone doing. But he did begin to understand that first you start with fingers and then sometimes even toys before you started in with a dick. An anus wasn’t open and wet like a woman’s pussy when she was aroused. Still, he was curios and a bit scared. What if Aoi wanted to touch him back there? Would it hurt? What should he expect? He didn’t want to be too surprised. He felt that if he could know some of what to expect, than it wouldn’t be so much of a shock and he might could just breathe through it. He could handle pain, Cha had said the first few times could be uncomfortable, but he wanted to get an idea of just _how_ uncomfortable it would be.

With that in mind he went to lay down in his bedroom. He was much more at ease in his own bed than just about anywhere in the world. He didn’t have to worry about taking his clothes off because more often than not, when home alone he went around nude. He fished in his night stand drawer and placed the bottle of special lube Cha had given him next to him. With a calming breath he closed his eyes and thought of Aoi. Immediately his dick began to swell, stirring into life. He traced his fingers down his chest, teasing his nipples, remembering the feel of Aoi’s lips there. His fingers caressed his shaft momentarily before sliding down to roll his testicals around. He gave them a pleasurable tug that brought a small moan to his lips. Hiking up one knee, he reached under his nuts to caress the taint behind them. It was incredibly sensitive, surprisingly so. One of those tender spots on his body that rarely ever got touched by anything. Tentatively he brushed a finger across his hole. A small gasp escaped from behind his clenched lips. It wasn’t a bad feeling. It was kind of nice even. Thinking of Aoi touching him there even made his hole quiver under his finger, much to his own surprise.  
  
Encouraged he reached over and flipped the cap on the lube. From everything he’d seen, further exploration would require the slippery stuff. Coating several fingers he used one hand to lift his balls out of the way and gently teased his own hole once again. The lube made the sensation even more intense, and he could see now why the men had seemed to enjoy being licked back there. Just this small amount of sensation was mesmerizing and he felt like he could enjoy being teased like this for hours. With curious intent, he gently applied pressure to the puckered entrance with one long slender fingertip. He continued to think of Aoi, afraid that if he let himself know that it was his own hand that was violating him it would cease to feel quite so good. With an ease that surprised him his finger slid in far past what he had intended and he gasped at the pleasure. It hadn’t hurt at all, and as he began to move his finger in and out of himself in imitation of that most intimate of acts… he could feel an orgasm building. There was something inside of him that begged for stimulation, that screamed out for satisfaction but he didn’t know what that was. And he couldn’t reach it. Something in him told him that only Aoi could provide it. Only Aoi could give his body what he needed. He tried to come, he truly did, but his body denied him. With a frustrated sigh he removed his finger and went to take a cold shower.  
  
As he fixed his hair and applied the lightest amount of makeup, a slight shadowing of his eyes and some lip gloss -- his anus still tingled. The sensation made him squirm, the soft silk of the suit only enhancing the stimulation of his skin and senses. He couldn’t wait to see Aoi, and he was proud of himself for overcoming a fear of being touched in his most intimate of places. In fact he was eager to have Aoi’s beautiful hands there. He still didn’t feel like a bottom or a Uke or anything like that. He still felt like all the things Aoi and Cha had said a Seme was. But he had always felt that there should be some compromises in a relationship. If they were going to truly be a couple than it wouldn’t be fair to Aoi to always take the Uke role, for Gackt to always want to be the Seme. And Aoi had said too that he was also a Seme, so it wouldn’t be fair to deny Aoi that role. It was just something they’d have to work on. He only hoped that Aoi felt the same way.    


With a nervous check of his hair in the rearview mirror, Gackt finally got out of the gorgeous sports car he’d rented and walked up to the entrance of Aoi’s apartment building. The doorman bowed respectfully and opened the door for him. Gackt made his way up to Aoi’s apartment, repeatedly glancing at his phone to make certain he was headed for the right door. Drying his damp hands on his pants he rang the bell.  
  
Aoi almost jumped out of his skin when the doorbell rang. He knew that Gackt would be on time, he didn’t think anything would keep the man from being punctual, but he was still scared. This would be their first real date, and what if he was dressed just way too inappropriately? What if Gackt thought he was a whore? What if?... but then the bell rang again and he didn’t want to Gackt to think that he’d gotten the wrong door. With a shrug of his shoulders to try and get rid of some tension he opened the door.  
  
The two just stood in the doorway, their mouths hanging open as they drank in each other’s appearance. Trembling fingers reached out and brushed Aoi’s stomach, causing him to suck it in involuntarily. “Where have you been all my life?” Gackt whispered in a hoarse voice. Aoi was the sexiest thing he’d ever seen in his life. The outfit was over-the-top-sexy-Jrocker for sure. Only a Jrocker or a hooker could have pulled it off. And Aoi was no whore… he was rock-n-fuckin’-roll. Aoi sucked in his lip ring and brushed his fingers appreciatively over the huge bulge that was now in Gackt’s pants.

 “waiting for you, lover” He said with an equally hoarse whisper. Reaching forward he licked playfully at Gackt’s stunned lips. “Let me grab my bag”. He had found a small purse shaped like his favorite guitar. He didn’t really care that it was purse for women, it fit with the VK image of his outfit and well, the pants had no pockets and he didn’t want to ask Gackt to hold his keys and wallet. Locking his door he took Gackt by the elbow. “So what’s the plan?”  
  
Gackt was so stunned by Aoi’s appearance, and by his teasing fingers and tongue that it took him a moment to register that Aoi had asked a question. “ huh, what?” He said, blinking away his stupor. “What. Is. The. Plan. For. Tonight?” Aoi spoke slowly, teasing Gackt lightly for spacing out. He himself was giddy. Gackt looked smoking hot, and he couldn’t  _wait_ for later, when he had every intention of helping the man out of that sinful suit. That tie had definite promise in it for some naughty play. If he had his way .. Gackt wouldn’t be ABLE to run away tonight. “oh Um.. Uh.. Dinner at Narcissus, and then well I didn’t know what you like to do so I didn’t make any plans other than dinner. I thought you could pick something for us to do afterwards. There’s several options available to us depending on how you feel after dinner”. Gackt blushed embarrassed that he had spent so much time on his clothes that he had forgotten to make just as elaborate a plan for their date activities. He had just failed  _“Amazing first dates 101”_.  
  
Aoi giggled softly at Gackt’s blush and his look of utter horror that he hadn’t made better plans. “It’s okay Gackt. Let’s eat dinner and while we eat we can plan the rest of our night. Or we _could_ just go home and find _other_ fun things to do with the rest of our night.” Aoi wiggled his eyebrows at Gackt, knowing full well it might frighten him. “th..the..that sounds .. _great_ ” Gackt stuttered. The sight, scent and feel of Aoi on his arm doing a fairly good job of rendering him stupid.  


The doorman raised his eyebrows at Aoi’s outfit and he heard the man whistle low as they passed. Gackt shot daggers at the man and took note of his nametag. He would have a talk with the man’s superior tomorrow and with luck the man would be out of job.  _How dare he make such a rude noise about HIS Aoi?_. They arrived at the restaurant without incident, Aoi complimenting him on his choice of chariots and laughing that he matched the décor. The restaurant was a new sensation, a 5-star restaurant that had an elegantly erotic theme. Many of the servers were either nude or scantily clad in elegant lingerie. It was one of the few restaurants that boasted Nyotaimori/Nantaimori service. Tonight though that sort of dining wasn’t in the plan. Instead Gackt had booked them one of the private dining areas with service by a trained Geisha. They would enjoy their meal privately while being entertained with music and dancing by their Geisha hostess.  
  
The concierge led them to their private room, a small space perhaps 4 or 5 feet in diameter with a small low table set for two, a riot of pillows and a small stage upon which a variety of instruments could be seen ready to be played. Although normally people would sit across from each other, Gackt hadn’t wanted to be that far from Aoi. He had requested that they be served so they could sit beside each other. It was a much more intimate seating arrangement, and certainly more intimate than most first-dates, but they had already been pretty much to third base already. A beautiful Geisha arrived, dressed to the nines in heavily embroidered kimono robes, her hair and makeup as regal as any Geisha depicted in royal portraits. There was an artful dance in every move she made. She was a living treasure of Japanese culture. With great ceremony she served them tea, a symbolic and auspicious beginning to what they hoped would be a lasting relationship.  
  
Gackt wasn’t sure what Aoi liked to eat, so he had asked the chef to prepare for them several of his most delicious dishes, he wanted to be surprised. “I hope you don’t mind Aoi, but I asked the chef to serve us a variety of his best dishes. Our dinner will be a surprise but I was assured we wouldn’t be disappointed.”  
  
Aoi was pleased with the restaurant, it was a perfect place to build a seduction. The private dining room was a surprise and it meant that Aoi could relax and not have to worry about being interrupted during dinner by a fan or to have photographs taken if they happened to kiss. He knew that Gackt wasn’t embarrassed to be seen with him, but they both had careers and superiors who didn’t approve of homosexual relationships. Having the press find out about them, especially the tabloids could ruin them both. It was also nice to see the Geisha. He’d heard of them of course, what Japanese hadn’t? But he had never had the chance to actually meet one, or to be served by one. Just watching her gracefully prepare and serve them the tea ceremony amazed him. He bowed in respect and admiration. “Thank you” he said softly in Japanese. He knew that her training would mean that she wouldn’t gossip about what happened in here tonight to anyone.  
  
Hearing Gackt’s comment he smiled, reassuring his lover. “I’m sure dinner will be wonderful. I know it will be, simply because you’re here beside me”. It was corny he knew, but true. He doubted he would even taste the food. Naughty thoughts of feeding Gackt drifted through his mind and he shifted on his cushion trying relieve some of the pressure on his aching groin. A part of him could still feel Gackt’s fingers tracing the crease of his bum and he wanted to feel that again.  
  
Gackt was doing some squirming of his own, his anus anxious and curious for Aoi’s exploration. He was starving as much for Aoi’s touch as for the delicious food he could smell wafting through the air. At last the food was served and it all looked and smelled fabulous. Plucking a scallop from a dish he held it out for Aoi to eat. With a smile Aoi opened his mouth to take the treat, making a great show of moaning at the taste and licking the chopsticks seductively. He was going to drive Gackt insane tonight, so insane that he wouldn’t want to do anything else but take Aoi home and fuck him senseless. That was the plan at any rate. Gackt whimpered lightly at the teasing and flushed. At this rate he wasn’t sure he’d even get through dinner. The more Aoi teased him the more he squirmed. They continued to feed each other succulent pieces of food in between heated kisses that had them both flushed and panting. The poor Geisha was almost completely ignored, for no other universe existed accept for them. The Geisha smiled to herself. It was rare to see two people so completely lost in each other, and a pleasure to facilitate such a world for them. She performed her duties with grace and efficiency providing soothing ambiance to the heated passion that was quickly growing between the two.  


Moaning Aoi whispered huskily against Gackt’s moist and kiss-swollen lips. “If you don’t take me home now, I’m gonna attack you right here and I really don’t want to go down on you in front of our Geisha. That would be kinda rude don’t you think?” Gackt panted and whined… “ Aoi.. please.. I need.. home.. yeah.. home now. “

Taking a large swallow of Saki to settle his racing heart he motioned for the Geisha to come over. “ If you could please give the chef our compliments the meal was exquisite, as was your service. I realize that we haven’t really seemed to pay much attention to you..” Gackt blushed furiously but smiled lovingly at Aoi. “But your soothing presence and music has really helped to make our first date… unforgettable. Thank you – truly”  
  
The Geisha bowed low, “You are most welcome Gackt-san, Shiroyama-san. It was a pleasure to serve you. It is rare that I get to serve two people who seem to be each other’s world. I pray that your relationship flourishes.” With that she slipped out the room, giving them privacy to neatly arrange themselves before their departure. The entire evening had already been paid for prior to their arrival, and Gackt had no intention to wait for to go boxes. The two lovers were both slightly disheveled from their heated kisses and stolen caresses during dinner, so it took a bit of laughing and fussing before they were both “decent” enough to go back out into public. They ran laughing for Gackt’s car, which was waiting for them as they ran out of the restaurant. What a blessing, but Gackt guessed that the Geisha must have informed the valet for their imminent departure. They’d both been somewhat surprised to be recognized, but were grateful that the Geisha had simply been so polite and hoped that she would remain professional and not reveal their budding romance.  
  
“I think my house is closer than your apartment, mind if we go to my place?” Gackt said as he buckled his seatbelt. “Anywhere as long as there’s a bed and we get there SOON” Aoi said in a husky voice. His hand reached over and he stroked Gackt to get his point across. He wanted Gackt and he wanted him NOW, hell he wanted him the moment they first kissed but his hormones were raging and he felt like he could pound out a sword with his dick he was so hard. Gackt groaned and peeled rubber out of the parking lot. He drove like his life depended on it. He felt as if it did. His body was on fire, burning with need. He wasn’t certain what was going to happen tonight but he felt that it was going to be monumental. Life-changing, world-shattering – eternal.

 

 


	12. chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after dinner shenanigans

Chapter 12

Gackt reached the gates of his house in record speed. Thankfully he knew all the back roads and alleys needed to make it in the fastest time possible while avoiding the speed traps. Gackt loved his sports cars and it just wasn’t any fun to own a car that could pull 270 mph and NOT actually attempt to push that limit every once in a while. So occasionally he street raced, but always just for fun or just with some money on the line. He never raced for pink slips. He had no use for winning someone else’s car, and he certainly didn’t want to lose any of his ‘babies’ as he called them. He was quite possessive of his things … and friends… and lovers… and family. Yup, you’d almost think he was an only child. Everything in his domain was “Mine”.  
  
With a purr of the engine he pulled into the drive and leaned over to give Aoi a quick heated kiss before climbing out and jogging over to the other side to help Aoi out like the gentleman he was. It was a dual consideration. For one, he always did such things for women, and two – He wasn’t sure that Aoi in his state of arousal and those tight pants could have gotten out by himself without rendering him useless in the bedroom for at least several hours. And that was NOT in the plan for tonight.  
  
Aoi smiled at the thoughtfulness that Gackt showed in opening the door and holding out his hand for him. And a part of him was grateful, because he was painfully hard behind his laced on pants. Certain positions while so confined might possibly have caused serious damage. He couldn’t wait to get naked and be free of the confines of his clothing. Once standing he tugged Gackt forward and plastered his mouth with a searing kiss that left them both breathless and trembling. It took them a moment just to be able to walk to the door.  
  
Gackt fumbled with the key, his hands trembling in his excitement and desire of what was to come. The moment the door was opened he toed off his shoes and shucked his jacket, leaving it draped across a chair. Even in his heated state, he was still conscientious of the quality of the suit and didn’t want to just rip it all off and leave it on the floor. Then again the idea of Aoi tearing his clothes off had appeal. He backed up into his home, down the hallway motioning Aoi in a “come hither” gesture while he loosened his tie.  
  
Aoi meanwhile was quickly, or as quickly as he could, trying to divest himself of the boots that had played so great a part in Gackt’s undoing. Damn things were hard to unlace with trembling fingers and Aoi was getting dizzy bending over like that, so with a frustrated grunt he finally plopped down on his luscious ass and began trying to wrestle them off his feet. He looked somewhat like a cat trying to lick it’s balls with one leg almost behind his ear as he tucked and cursed at the boot that seemed to be super-glued to his ankles. Gackt saw him struggling and tried, and failed, not to laugh.  
  
“Hmm... baby your flexibility is giving me naughty ideas. Here let me help you...” Kneeling on the floor he grabbed the booted ankle and lifted Aoi’s leg toward him. He leaned forward and placed a kiss upon one of Aoi’s thighs, trailing small licks, kisses and nips down toward Aoi’s knee. Aoi deflated like a balloon and fell backwards in a mindless heap as he moaned his pleasure. It wasn’t even incredibly sexy being sprawled out in the foyer like that, but the feel of Gackt’s mouth on him: The tender way he seemed to worship each bit of skin his lips, tongue, teeth and breath caressed made Aoi eager to know what was going to come next. Gackt hadn’t seemed scared at all, even though Aoi had basically told him he intended to pop Gackt’s cherry tonight.  
  
Gackt rested Aoi’s heel on his shoulder and bent to examine the ribbon lacing Aoi’s boot shut. In his hurry he had managed to cause it to form a tight knot that refused a hurried release. Smiling he knelt up and grabbed his keys off the tiny stand that stood in the entryway. He always kept a small pocket knife on his keychain for just such emergencies as a stray thread, or unruly ribbon such as this. He didn’t figure Aoi would mind. Opening the small knife with his teeth, he quickly popped the ribbon and set the knife aside to begin unlacing the boot while occasionally teasing Aoi’s exposed thigh with small caresses and the scratching of his nails. He couldn’t remember the last time he had a lover that was so responsive so such a simple touch. This was surely to be a night neither would forget for the rest of their lives.  
  
Finally, the offending boot slid off of Aoi’s ankle and he placed a kiss to the inside of the ankle bone. A tender spot he himself had found to be quite pleasant the .. two.. times someone had kissed him there. He let go of Aoi’s foot to lean over and give Aoi’s hip groove a nip.  _“ God, I want to taste every part of you Aoi….”_ He whispered huskily, before turning his attention to the other foot. This ribbon wasn’t so tightly tied, and came apart easily. In seconds it seemed Aoi was freed of the confines of his shoes and looking gloriously disheveled.  


“ come on … lets find somewhere softer than this to continue…” Reluctantly he climbed off of Aoi and stood up, holding his hand down to help his partner and soon-to-be lover off the floor.  
  
In between kisses, Gackt divested Aoi of his lace shrug, tossing it over the back of his couch on their way to the bedroom. He had no doubts, no insecurities that he wanted Aoi in his bed. Not at that moment. He might have cause for pause once he saw Aoi’s erection but he didn’t think that would stop him. He wanted, needed this man like he needed air to breathe.  
  
In the meantime, Aoi was busy undoing Gackt’s shirt, though he kept the tie in place. He had plans for that tie, and didn’t want to lose it. Gackt’s shirt also got tossed onto a piece of furniture and at last they were in his bedroom. The most prominent feature in the room was his massive king-sized ROUND bed, surrounded by – of all things – a swimming pool, it even had a waterfall running down the back wall which added a soothing sound of running water to the room. There was a foyer of sorts to the room that provided dressers, closets and an entrance to an equally massive bathroom. Oddly enough the room didn’t smell of chlorine as one would expect. It just smelled like water, with hints of some sort of scented candle or perfume.  
  
Aoi stopped and stared in awe. It was … the most… rock-star bedroom he’d ever been in. And so weird that it fit Gackt to a tee. He started laughing. “ I take it … you like to swim?” Gackt chuckled at his comment.  
  
“ I enjoy being nude in my own home, and there’s nothing like skinny dipping when you can’t sleep. The water isn’t chlorinated, it’s treated with an oxygen/copper system that prevents algea growth without all the added chemicals. It’s as safe as bathwater, you can even drink it. And I can regulate the temperature to between 65-120 degrees, though I don’t often heat it up to hot-tub temperatures. After we get all hot and sweaty we can just dip into the pool to cool off.” Gackt smiled and kissed Aoi. “ I’m sooo looking forward to that.. getting hot and sweaty with you that is”.  
  
If Gackt was a nudist at heart than Aoi could see a very active sex life in their future, because there was no way in hell he’d be able to keep his hands to himself if he got to see Gackt naked 24/7 while they were at home. He kind of smiled at that thought. Already he was thinking long-term. Thinking of spending _years_ if not the rest of his life with this man. But he couldn’t see them living in Aoi’s small apartment. This house was enormous and it was so full of Gackt’s personality that he couldn’t see asking Gackt to leave it for any reason. He was sure that if they could make their relationship work, he could find a place here.  
  
Aoi reached out and undid the belt and button of Gackt’s slacks. He teased the straining erection behind the zipper as he slooowly tugged it down. “ I do believe we have more important things to attend to than your boudoir pool.” Dropping to his knees he gently freed Gackt’s erection and gave it an appreciative lick. Gackt’s knees almost buckled, the sight of Aoi on his knees licking and touching him was almost his undoing. 

He backed up, tugging on Aoi’s hands. “not here baby, on the bed. If you try to do that while I’m standing I’m likely to fall over into the pool and you wouldn’t want me to drown before you had a chance to keep your promise would you? “ Aoi looked up at him confused. “ what promise?” Gackt somehow managed to smile coyly and blush innocently all at the same time as he said. “Aww, I could have sworn you promised to sex me unconscious but maybe that was just wishful thinking on my part….”  
  
Aoi laughed at what was obviously a challenge. If Gackt was challenging him – inviting him – to take him, he would. He most definitely would. “oh you..” he growled and lunged for Gackt who dodged away. Running for the bed, Gackt managed to launch himself backwards on it, catching Aoi in mid-leap and only grunting slightly at the delicious weight upon his chest. “Strip me quickly Aoi… I need to feel you. I need you to touch me .. ” Gackt’s voice broke in a hoarse whisper, now that they were here,  his body and hormones and heart were ramped up for the full game.

 

 


	13. chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Communication is vital to getting what you want.

Chapter 13

Aoi laughed, a little breathless at Gackt’s eagerness. It seemed that so many barriers had come crashing down, and that Gackt was prepared as always to take up the challenge and win. “Patience is a virtue Gackt…” he whispered. He rolled his naked body beneath Gackt, moaning slightly at the feel of skin to skin, “ I think the lust has fogged your brain… we’re already naked”  
  
Aoi opened his legs slightly to let the weight of Gackt’s pelvis settle between them, enjoying the feel of their hardened shafts pressing, rubbing together. He scratched his nails down Gackt’s spine until he reached its base then grabbed a good double handful of Gackt’s ass and squeezed, pushing them closer together. Nibbling on Gackt’s jaw as he murmured to him. “It’s been a long time since I bottomed to anyone. But I _have_ bottomed. You haven’t, so… what do you want to do tonight? We can do as little or as much as you feel up to. Though I am _going_  to suck your cock, and you are  _going_  to come in my mouth… I want to taste you Gackt. I want to _taste_ your passion”  
  
Aoi’s touch had him trembling, and his cock so hard that it felt like it might break with the weight between them. The feel of Aoi’s own hardness pressed between them felt both good and intimidating. His touch, his mouth had felt so good a few minutes ago. Gackt wanted that,  yes, more of that.... but he also wanted… more. He leaned up on his elbows so he could see Aoi’s face.  


“I was thinking about us… about sex…. Between us .. and. “ Gackt stopped, blushing in embarrassment. Aoi’s hand on his butt only made his stimulated entrance beg for more of what he’d given it earlier. He dipped his head, almost afraid to admit what he wanted.  
  
Aoi reached up and cupped Gackt’s face, brushing the hair from his shaded eyes. “Gackt .. you have to _ask_  for what you want. It’s nothing to be ashamed about. Just _ask_ … if it’s something I don’t want to do I can always say no. I’ll do the same with you, if there’s something I want to do and you don’t we’ll compromise. That’s what makes a relationship work. Communication and compromise.”  
  
Gackt took a deep breath and spoke quietly.  “Well I was thinking… at first that I’d really like to be on top because, well that’s what I’m familiar with. But then I thought that – well that’s not fair to you, to always ask you to bottom. I mean you’d said you were a top but we can’t both be top all of the time. So then I thought, well... maybe I should  _try_  to bottom sometimes... but that was kind of scary thinking.  I really want to be a good lover for you though, so it’s my responsibility to try it right? So I borrowed some porn from Cha….. “  
  
Gackt made a gagging face. “ Gay porn is definitely NOT my thing. But I did notice that there was some kind of preparation steps you take… before …. You know. “  
  
Aoi rolled them over, Enjoying Gackt’s weight and the feel of his skin and had to stifle back a laugh at Gackt’s nervous rambling. What he was saying caused Aoi to respect him a lot more, because half of him expected Gackt to just assume he’d be the Seme and Aoi would be the Uke. The fact that he’d actually listened to Aoi about Aoi’s own preferences and experiences said a lot about how serious Gackt was taking this relationship. Aoi couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a lover willing to be a switch.  
  
Aoi nodded “ Go on… “ trying to encourage him to finish what he was saying and to make his request. So far nothing he’d said made Aoi afraid he’d ask for something  _really_  weird or kinky. “Well, I was thinking all that and watching the video and it made me curious… what was it gonna feel like to be touched back there? I mean, I didn’t want to be all scared and freaked out if you wanted to touch me there. I thought if I knew some of what to expect, then it wouldn’t be so bad.”  
  
Aoi quirked an eyebrow, it made sense. “ okay, so you….” Aoi trailed off, not quite certain where this was going. “Well … I …. I kind of um… fingered myself today” Gackt buried his face in Aoi’s shoulder, completely embarrassed that he’d even said that out loud, let alone admitted it to anyone, least of all Aoi.  
  
Aoi threaded his fingers through Gackt’s hair and gently massaged his scalp. He trailed his fingers up his spine to calm him. “ And how did it feel Gackt?” He asked softly. If Gackt had given himself a bad experience, than that would be a roadblock in their relationship, and it would take time to overcome it.  


A bit of silence dragged out, as Gackt trembled under his touch. “It was …  _nice_. Weird but nice. But I needed something more, I can’t describe it, but I know that whatever it was … you can give it to me.” Gackt lifted his head to look in Aoi’s face, to gauge his eyes. “Will you touch me Aoi? Will help me find what I’m missing?”  
  
Aoi gave Gackt a loving half-smile, knowing the kind of courage it must have taken a strong-willed man like Gackt to ask for such a thing. “Just so I understand.. “ Aoi said, as he trailed a hand down Gackt’s back until he tapped the crease between his cheeks. “is that you want me to touch you… _pleasure_  you…  ** _here_**. Is that right?” There could be no doubts or misunderstandings on this, Aoi knew that.  
  
If he hadn’t been watching Gackt’s face intently he might have missed his answer. But Gackt barely nodded his head and whispered “yes, _there_. But.. maybe ...just a finger for now?” The question was asked with such innocent uncertainty. Aoi leaned up and pressed a sweet kiss on Gackt’s lips, slowly deepening it until Gackt relaxed down onto him again, moaning. His one hand stayed gently teasing and tickling that crease until he could feel Gackt unconsciously opening his legs a bit wider to give him better access.  
  
Breaking the kiss, Aoi gently tugged on Gackt’s head to pull him away. “you’re going to have to roll over lover. I can’t take proper care of you with you lying on top of me. Besides if you put anymore weight on my dick, I’m gonna be of no use to you tonight.” 

Gackt laughed. “ I said you could _finger_ me, I didn’t say you could  _fuck_  me. We’ll just have to see how good you are. Mm.. we definitely want you to be able to enjoy yourself. And I really liked that hand-job thing you did with our things pressed together..” with that Gackt rolled over pulling Aoi over to rest on top of him. The roll caused Aoi to be straddling one of his thighs and he pressed it lightly up, giving slight pressure to Aoi’s groin. Aoi’s hands had shifted as well. One hand rested near his hip, and one was still on the back of his neck.  
  
Aoi leaned down to steal another heated kiss then started crawling down Gackt’s body, nipping , licking and sucking a path down Gackt’s torso. He took his time following the curves of Gackt’s collarbone, worried his nipples until Gackt was writhing and gasping and his nipples looked pert enough to suckle a newborn. And still he didn’t stop, he trailed down, nipping along the lines of ribs, and licked the grooves of those godly abs. When he got to the hip groove he gave it special attention. Biting down he got a good strong grip with his teeth, and sucked bringing the blood to the surface. He knew Gackt’s personality, knew he could take the pain – and probably enjoy it. And from the sounds Gackt made – he was right. When he was done he leaned up to admire his mark of possession. He growled in satisfaction at the bright mark, then leaned down to lick some of the sting away, like a cat grooming its sibling.  **“mine”**  he growled.  
  
Gackt lay gasping and writhing in mindless pleasure. He’d had lovers before that liked to scratch and bite, but … it had never felt this good. Aoi had…. A sixth sense, a  **natural instinct** , that caused him to provide just the perfect amount of pressure in his bites so that the pleasure overwhelmed the bit of pain. By the time he’d reached Gackt’s hips his nerves were singing, so much so, that the sudden more savage bite tore a cry of pleasure/pain from his lips that he didn’t think was possible. Sure he knew he was a bit of a sadist, but not usually in the bedroom. And his bandmates would make the argument that he was a bit of a masochist as well with how hard he pushed himself in his work, but he had never seen himself that way. He had never really played the S&M games in bed. The closest thing he’d ever gotten to such was the occasional light bondage.  
  
Aoi simply amazed him, because when he was submissive and gentle it made Gackt feel powerful and sexy. But he when he was dominant as he was now… it spoke to something in Gackt that had never been reached before. He ** _liked_**  the way he felt with Aoi overpowering him, biting him, claiming him. And a ragged sigh left his lips as he realized this. This was the  ** _thing,_**  or one of them anyway, that had missing all these years. Someone he could dominate and spoil and take care of, Someone who could dominate **_him_** and make him submit and who would take care of him in turn.  ** _Someone,_** who could be both. And he had to admit, the women he was attracted to were beautiful, feminine, but in no way dominant. He just had yet to meet woman strong enough that he could respect them enough to let them dominate him. They just… weren’t his equal, and Aoi was, so somehow his dominance of or submission to Gackt didn’t seem like a threat. It just seemed…. Natural.  
  
Aoi purred in triumph to himself at the cry he’d torn from Gackt’s lips. He could feel the tension in Gackt’s body, and the sudden release of it. Knew that some kind of switch had just been thrown in Gackt’s head – though he wasn’t sure what that might be. Predatory instincts arose in him, and he determined to pleasure Gackt so thoroughly that he fairly _begged_  Aoi to fuck him. And even if he didn’t… Aoi turned his head to gaze at the porn-sized appendage currently tapping Gackt’s taught stomach. Now _there_  was something to look forward to. No doubt it was gonna hurt like a mother fucker for the first few minutes, the first few strokes…. But there was cock he would feel for  _days_  afterward. It was certainly the biggest one he’d ever encountered, but he had no doubt… someday and probably tonight it would be inside him.

 

 


	14. chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Gackt loses his virginity

Chapter 14

Aoi reluctantly climbed off of Gackt and started fishing around in his night stand intent on finding lubrication. He grinned when he found the large tube of  **Anal EZ** gel. It was perfect for introducing Gackt to the pleasures of his prostate. Climbing back up onto the bed, he settled himself down between Gackt's legs wiggling the tube at him. "I see someone is prepared... " Gackt blushed . "It was a gift from Cha..." Aoi smiled. "I'll have to thank the man. Now you just lay back and relax, lover and let me take care of you. I'll tell you before I penetrate so there won't be any surprises okay?" Gackt nodded though he wasn't sure he'd be able to relax. Yet something in him trusted Aoi to make this as much an amazing experience as all of his other homosexual experiences had been with Aoi. Gackt was not a lover of men, but he loved Aoi and loved what the other man's body made him feel.  
  
Aoi scooted down until he was laying between Gackt's legs. With light massaging strokes he encouraged Gackt to open his legs wider and eventually with kisses and nips to the backs of Gackt’s knees and thighs got him to lift them out of his way. "Hold your knees up high and wide baby, I'm going to make you feel amazing" Aoi licked his lips as he eyed the heavy sex before him and the tempting virginal balloon knot he knew only he would ever breach. Aoi used his hands to stroke soothing, teasing, calming strokes to the back of Gackt’s exposed thighs as he leaned up to take Gackt's stiff and weeping length into his mouth. At that angle, with his legs up in the air Gackt couldn't move his hips much, having little leverage though goodness knows they tried. Aoi's mouth was hot and the suction he placed on the head of his weeping cock made his eyes roll back in his head. Gackt could do nothing but let out some incoherent grunts and moans.

Aoi relaxed his jaw and took more of Gackt down into his throat, swirling his tongue around the head and savoring the unique flavor that was Gackt. Gackt's health consciousness paid off in this department, for his cum was balanced and slightly sweet. Aoi had learned that men who ate mostly red meat and chicken and who ate few fruits and vegetables had very strong, musky cum that was distateful. They also had a certain strong musk to their sex that was almost nauseating. But Gackt, his musk was mild, his taste savory and sweet. Gackt was someone he would very much enjoy swallowing. Aoi increased the suction and started to bob his head up and down, taking more of Gackt down his throat every few bobs. Gackt was a  **very well endowed**  man and Aoi couldn't ever remember deep-throating someone so long. His fingers stroked closer and closer to that rosebud as pleasured moans filled the air and finally a strong grip made its way into his hair. Gackt wasn't so much controlling his movements as holding on for dear life. Aoi liked to have his hair pulled though, so the grip only served to ramp up his arousal.  
  
Moving his hands between them even as he tried to continue to bob upon Gackt’s cock with no other support other than his own abdominal muscles and Gackt’s hands, he flipped the cap on the lube and squirted some onto his fingers, slicking up three of them. Then he braced himself and touched Gackt's entrance with one slicked finger. He didn't penetrate yet, simply rubbed over it until Gackt was panting and gasping and begging.  _"Please, please, please...._. Aoi came off of his cock with a wet plop and turned his head to bite playfully at the creamy thigh next to him. "Gackt, I'm going to press my finger inside soon and you're not to cum until i'm inside you. Nod if you understand." Gackt was almost senseless with pleasure, Aoi's mouth was maddening and that  **finger**! He wanted to feel that finger inside of him, pleasuring him and he wanted it  **right now**. He probably would have agreed to anything at the moment, so lost was he to Aoi's ministrations.  
  
Aoi grazed his teeth down the underside of Gackt's cock, teeth nipping and causing pleasured cries from the other that made him think Gackt was maybe more of a masochist than either of them had figured. Aoi lifted Gackt's balls and continued his oral assault. Licking, nipping and sucking on the taint all the while rubbing and teasing Gackt's hole until it was winking at him with needy stimulation. With an evil grin Aoi spread Gackt's cheeks a bit wider then bent his head and licked Gackt's hole. The older man cried out and started trembling and Aoi took it as a good sign. This far down Gackt had lost his grip on Aoi's hair, and so had taken to gripping his thighs again. Aoi silently mourned the loss of that tight grip, but relished in giving Gackt such pleasure that he could only hang on for dear life. Aoi pressed his tongue inside the other gently, a little at a time until the other was begging and mumbling  _"oh kami, oh kami.. oh fuck.. fuck.. fuck..."_  
  
Aoi smiled and tongued him a bit longer before pressing a finger against his entrance. "You're mine now baby... " He said before he gently pressed the finger inside. So worked up was Gackt that he met almost no resistance enjoying the way Gackt moaned and cursed, obviously shamefully enjoying the pleasurable violation of his body. Aoi curled his finger and twisted his wrist pumping his finger gently in and out of his virginal lover as he watched him struggle to assimilate all the pleasure and strange sensations. The way Gackt almost had a seizure when he found the man's prostate had been amusing. As was the involuntary small spurt of cum that had squirted from his cock. Gackt started babbling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to but... _oh fuck please do that again_... it felt so good... so good... please Aoi.. more... give me more.... " Gackt chewed on his lip. He knew there was more pleasure to be had and from more than just one finger. Everything was so overwhelming and right then he wanted everything Aoi could give him. He had never been so needy for sex, so overwhelmed with sensation and pleasure in his entire life and he had had many lovers. His skin was super-sensitive and his blood felt fit to boil. His heart was pounding in his ears and his lungs felt heavy but he didn't want it to stop. If Aoi tried to leave him stranded right then He might just have to pin the man down and take what he needed of the younger man's hard cock, proper preparations be damned.  
  
Aoi smiled down at Gackt and leaned up to kneel in front of Gackt's ass, his finger still working him, though at Gackt's pleading he fingered him a bit harder, making sure to crook his finger and abuse Gackt's prostate with every stroke, learning it's exact location for when he would need to find it with his cock at any angle. He leaned forward and captured Gackt's gasping moaning lips in a searing kiss as he pulled his finger almost all the way out only to gently press two fingers into his lover. Gackt's body clamped down upon the intrusion and he crooned into Gackt's mouth. "Relax baby, just relax. One finger felt amazing yeah? Two will feel even better if you relax past the stretch. Trust me love, you won't regret it, relax ... shh.... Aoi will take care of you.... "  
  
Gackt squeaked into Aoi's kiss when he felt the second finger breach him. The stretch was uncomfortable though not necessarily painful. Still, his body wasn't sure what to think of it and he could feel himself spasming against the intrusion, the spasms pulling at that ring of muscles uncomfortably. But Aoi's soft soothing voice, his kisses, his encouraging words calmed him and he made a conscious effort to try to get his anus to relax. With a deep calming breath he forced his body to obey his mental command and at last Aoi's fingers were seated to the hilt . Aoi wiggled his fingers inside of him and Gackt could feel those warm fingers touching something inside of him, that special spot that made him see stars. "Move... move.... ah... " Gackt huffed, starting to enjoy the feel of the stretch and movement of those sinful fingers so deep within him.  
  
Aoi nodded, pleased that Gackt had listened to him and had finally relaxed, he'd  _felt_ it when Gackt's body opened to accept his fingers and he had slid them to the hilt with a purr of possession. Once again he wiggled his fingers, pumping slowly in and out of Gackt's body. Twisting his wrist and grazing the man's prostate like he was playing his guitar, until once again Gackt was a writhing mess begging for more. When Aoi could finger Gackt fast and hard and he felt the other was close to cumming he didn't even hesitate - he gripped the base of Gackt's cock with one hand to prevent him from cumming and pressed a third finger inside immediately pumping the fingers at a slow but deep rhythm. Gackt cried out beneath him and strained to cum from the sensation of being filled so completely, the stretch painful but gloriously good in an indescribable way. Aoi panted, close to cumming himself just from watching Gackt's expressions and the way he reacted to him. Aoi let go of Gackt's cock and pumped his hand hard and deep stroking Gackt's prostate possessively.  **"cum, Gackt! cum now!** " He growled and Gackt arched hard, cumming in long thick ropes between them, splattering both their chests.  
  
Withdrawing his hand Aoi quickly slicked up his straining cock liberally with the lube and some of Gackt's own cum. He pressed the head of his engorged cock against Gackt's recently abused entrance. He could feel it spasming needily against his hot flesh. "Gackt baby... are you ready? I want to bring you to orgasm again, but with me inside of you." Gackt pulled Aoi down into a harsh kiss, even as his legs locked around Aoi's hips and shoved him slightly forward causing the head of his cock to pop right past the first ring of muscles that guarded Gackt's entrance. With a groan into Gackt's needy mouth that was busy dominating his own Aoi sank himself gently into Gackt's tight hot depths. Though Gackt's body felt tight, and he could still feel the after tremors of his virgin lovers orgasm, it didn't grip him in the way that a painful intrusion could cause. Still he let Gackt dominate the kiss, smiling softly at the fact that Gackt was basically frantically tongue fucking his mouth with the same urgency he'd fingered him.  
  
He was going to just sit there a moment and let Gackt adjust but a painfully tight grip in his hair made the kiss break and Gackt growled darkly as he nipped Aoi's bottom lip. "MOVE" So Aoi did as his lover commanded, enjoying the demanding dominant Uke beneath him. Aoi leaned in to nip sharply at Gackt's earlobe even as He rocked his hips in small deep thrusts. "Does it feel good baby? I like it when you get all dominant and I love it when you pull my hair. It really flips my switch, so don't be ashamed when you do that... I like it. You feel so good baby, so tight and hot. Your sweet body is like nothing I've ever experienced. It's truly amazing... "

Gackt was almost senseless, the feel of Aoi's thick hot shaft buried so deep within him felt so much better than he could have ever imagined. Some deep seated warmth that thawed out the frozen pieces of his heart and soul. This hot, incredibly deep and intimate caress that no one before had been privileged to give him. And yet, Gackt could think of no one else he would want to touch him this way except for Aoi - this dark angel above him. Gackt tightened his grip in Aoi's hair experimentally and watched as his lover closed his eyes in a hiss of pleasure. They were matched it seemed, for there was just enough sadist in Gackt to get a rush of pleasure from pulling Aoi's hair and dominating him and it made him feel less guilty about that to know that Aoi enjoyed it.  
  
The feeling of Aoi's slow rocking was amazing but Gackt knew that Aoi hadn't cum yet, and a part of him had relished the feel of those harsh bumps to his prostate when Aoi had finger fucked him just moments ago. He didn't care if he was sore later, he wanted to witness Aoi's unleashed passion. Wanted to still  _feel him_ inside him for days. "Aoi.... more... baby just let go... fuck me like you want to... fuck me like you mean to crawl right inside me and leave your mark. Cum inside me and leave me your hot wet kiss. "

  
Gackt knew it was a lewd request, and that Aoi in his compassion might still hold back, but he wanted to let Aoi know how much he was enjoying this and how much he trusted Aoi to take his own pleasure without losing sight of Gackt's own comfort.

  
Aoi hummed in pleasure at the resumed grip on his scalp though Gackt's words surprised him. Aoi took him at his word though, confident that Gackt would let him know if things got too rough, though he had no intention of letting completely loose. Aoi withdrew almost all the way and pressed hard back in, increasing the speed and depth of his thrusts until he was pounding hard on Gackt's prostate with each stroke and Gackt was trying to bite back his screams. "Scream for me Gackt, don't hold back baby... I want to make you cum again. Let me know how good I feel to you.. SCREAM.." And Gackt did, he cried out and screamed Aoi's name with almost every strike to his prostate and in a mere matter of minutes Aoi too was screaming and cumming so hard inside Gackt that he felt like his balls had imploded and his ass clenched hard. His vision blared white and he began to see those little shadow spots that usually preceded one's loss of consciousness. Gackt was not far behind, the incredible feel of his lover's hot release licking him so deep inside and the pressure against his prostate proving too much. Gackt came, though not as hard as Aoi since he hadn't had time to build up a lot of fluid.  
  
Still Gackt wrapped his legs tightly around the other so he couldn't pull out and he pulled Aoi into a deep kiss. "Oh my fucking...  **GOD**.. that was amazing. You have to that again.... like at least once a day for ... the rest of my life.  _My ass is so totally yours for the taking_. " Gackt laughed weakly, still sated and weak from cumming twice in less than 2 hours, hell twice in less than 10 minutes which had to be a record even for him. Gackt clenched his ass experimentally around Aoi's softening shaft enjoying the feel of him lodged there, something Gackt had never in his life thought would happen. That he would enjoy someone's cock in his ass. Aoi groaned and shuddered at the feel of Gackt's ass  _stroking him_ as deliciously as with a hand. Now  _that_  was handy. "Baby, you're gonna kill me. If you don't stop clenching and stroking me like that, I'm gonna get hard again and then you really will get the shit fucked out of you and then you'll be too sore for fun for a few days. Let me go baby... It's your turn to fuck me remember? Let's get cleaned up and I'll see if I can get you worked up again. hmmm... though you'll have to give me some preparation. I hate to admit it but, even though I'm horny as hell right now, even I can't take you without lots  _and lots_  of prep. You'll be the biggest lover I've ever bottomed to. But damn if I don't want to give it a try." Aoi lifted a sweaty head and looked down at his lover. They were both moist from their naughty aerobics and the scent of sex hung thick in the air.

 


	15. chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gackt tops

Chapter 15

Weakly they both stumbled from the bed and into the pool. The cool water caused them both to gasp and perk up a bit.  Laughing they splashed each other playfully.  Aoi was still a bit surprised and shocked at Gackt's resilience and open acceptance of him.  Gackt's desire gave him courage that maybe, just maybe , they'd be able to make this work.  No matter what anyone else might say, they knew they had a powerful chemistry that went beyond traditional definitions of sexuality and orientation.  They desired and loved each other in spite of Gackt's natural inclination toward women, and that spoke for something like destiny having a hand in this and not chaos.  
  
Gackt stretched out in the water and quickly swam a few laps around the bed, let the water wash away the sweat and other fluids from his body.  His lower body had a pleasant ache to it that warned him it might not be too happy with him in the morning.... but tonight it tingled and still craved the heat and sinful caress of Aoi's cock.  And the thought of making love to Aoi... of burying himself hilt-deep made him shiver.  He wanted to lean over Aoi and watch the emotions flash in Aoi's beautiful eyes as his body was possessed inch by inch. He wanted to be the one to make the beautiful guitarist shatter with pleasure. With those thoughts in mind he returned to Aoi's side who'd been treading water, watching Gackt swim with the grace of some water borne animal.  
  
"Hey there beautiful"  Gackt grinned as he pulled Aoi into a wet kiss, his hands seeking the other's hips and pulling him closer.  Aoi grinned back and accepted the kiss eagerly, supremely glad that there seemed to be no hesitation at all in the older vocalist.  He relished in this simple act of open affection, and sought to encourage him in it.  Aoi's own hands slid up Gackt's wet torso to tease Gackt's pert nipples as he moaned into the kiss.  Despite the cold water, both of them were more than halfway ready to go at it again.  The sensual feeling of the water gently lapping at their skin in sharp contrast to their heated bodies only seemed to increase the pleasure in every touch.  Breaking the kiss reluctantly, Gackt attacked Aoi's throat kissing and suckling the water off as his hands slid around to cup Aoi's luscious ass.  "mmmm.... when we're both more experienced, pool sex is definitely on the menu..."  Gackt murmured before a soft needy moan escaped his throat as he felt Aoi lift his legs and wrap them around Gackt's waist.  He could feel Aoi's erection pressing against his own as the vocalist slowly lifted and dropped his body, grinding himself against Gackt's waist.   
  
Aoi arched his neck, loving the attention it was receiving and loved the way Gackt thought for the idea had entered his mind the moment Gackt kissed him.  Wrapping his legs around Gackt's waist gave him a confirmation that this definitely was going to have be on their sexual menu.  Somewhere near the top. "Oh yeah.... definitely on the menu. "  Aoi moaned.  Gackt glanced over Aoi's shoulder and spotted the stairs that led out of the pool.  Heading in that direction, he captured Aoi's lips in another slow kiss, one hand reaching underneath Aoi to stroke his rosebud gently with every step toward the stairs.  The slow walk made for a very rhythmic caress and which had Aoi moaning and pressing back against that maddening digit that refused to breach him.  He took out his frustration on Gackt's lips and neck turning the tables on the other as they made their way back to bed.  
  
Gackt thanked the gods for his strength and his sadistic workout schedule, for it allowed him to carry the guitarist with ease across the pool and back around to the bed.  He was also enough of a sadist to really enjoy the fact he was frustrating his lover, by not letting his finger breach him yet.  But he was rewarded, because the way Aoi attacked his neck and shoulders so deliciously it was sure to leave marks in the morning.  And he wanted to be marked as Aoi's , already tonight had proved to be the best night of sex he'd ever had and the night wasn't nearly over yet.  
When they finally arrived at the bed Gackt turned around, falling so that Aoi landed on top of him.  Reaching up he gently cradled Aoi's head in his hands, admiring the beauty of kiss-swollen lips and cheeks flushed with passion, eyes glazed with lust and love.  "I want to feel you inside of me again.  Already my body misses your possession of it. So bear with me if I frustrate you, tease you... anything and everything I do to you -- you can do to me.  I  _want_  you to do to me.  I want to possess you and dominate you and pin you down and claim what's mine.  But I also want to  _be_  frustrated and full of such overwhelming need of you.  I want to give up  _everything_  and give you my complete submission.  I want to be claimed and marked and  _owned_  by you.  I'm selfish -- I want to be both your Master and your Slave."  Gackt blushed at his own admission.  
  
Becoming Aoi's Master appealed to the part of him that wanted and needed to control everything in his domain.  But becoming Aoi's Slave spoke to a different part of him.  A part that was  _tired_  of being in control,  _tired_  of being responsible for everyone else's well-being.  A part of him that wanted to be cared for and  _vulnerable_ , and to only have to focus on one person and nothing else.  A part of him that wanted to take whatever Aoi felt like dishing out be it pain or pleasure.   
  
Aoi was stunned by Gackt's words.  He hadn't played  _much_  in the BDSM world, but he had played  _enough_  to understand the implications in Gackt's heart-felt admission. Understood Gackt's need to control everything, and knew that with such a mindset he'd thrive in a Master/slave role.  But could Aoi bring himself to submit to Gackt in such a way?  Could he  _'give up everything'_  and just  _be_  whatever it was that Gackt needed of him to satisfy that need?  He'd never trusted anyone enough to take that step.  But he thought,  _eventually_ , he might be able to.  It surprised him though that Gackt had  _also_  said he wanted to be Aoi's slave. That idea had definite appeal.   _Gackt in a collar and leash_.  The image made him shudder with lust. He could definitely see how Gackt might need such a structure as the Master/slave game to actually relax and just  _feel_ things instead of trying to always be in control of his own emotions. He knew he would relish helping Gackt open up in such a vulnerable yet protected way.

  
But he had to be honest with Gackt, and himself.  They weren't anywhere  _near_  ready to play such games.  Not until they knew each other better and knew that anything that happened in such a game wasn't going to bleed over into their real love lives in a negative way.  Aoi wasn't sure if he wanted to  _live_  the game or just  _play_  it.  They needed time to figure that out.  He smiled softly down at Gackt.  "I'll take whatever you dish out Gackt because I know you won't hurt me.  Not really.  But I think we need time to take it slow.  I haven't played much in the BDSM world but I do know that we're nowhere near ready for that.  But I appreciate your honesty and the fact that you seem to trust me enough to be your Master.  It's just that.. well... I've never submitted to anyone before.  And I'm not sure I can, even for you.  We'll have to work up to that.  I think if I was going to do that..  _submit_.. for anyone it would be you."  
  
Gackt was a tiny bit disappointed that Aoi hadn't immediately returned his desires with an affirmation of his own.  But he understood.  Such a relationship was built upon an incredible amount of trust and though they'd built alot in just the short time they'd been together, Gackt had to admit that Aoi was right.  It was far too soon for that much kink to make its way into their bedroom and their lives.  Though Gackt was pretty sure he was already ready to make such a commitment to Aoi, he just had to be patient.  
  
Gackt nodded his understanding pulling Aoi down for another wet kiss as his finger went back to teasing his entrance.  He felt Aoi open his legs, giving him better access to the hidden rosebud. He broke the kiss and gave Aoi a worried look, though he enjoyed the look of Aoi panting with want of him.  "How do I make you ready for me love?  I don't want to hurt you, I'm pretty big."  He knew that it would likely involve fingers but Aoi knew his body way better than Gackt did and he wanted to make these preparations feels as amazing for Aoi as his own had been for Gackt.  Aoi smiled down lovingly at his insecure lover.  How far they had come in such a short time amazed him.  He swelled with pride to know that Gackt was so concerned about being a good lover to him.  "Lay me down baby, and I'll lead you through".  
  
Gackt rolled them over, careful to place Aoi on a dry piece of the blanket.  He looked at how they were sprawled and shook his head, it just wouldn't do.  He leaned down and gave Aoi a sweet kiss then crawled back for the head of the bed, patting the spot beside him.  Aoi rolled over and followed him in a sexy stalk that had Gackt's prodigious erection smacking the bed in anticipation. Aoi's heavy sex hung down and swayed as he crawled toward him the sight making Gackt's hole clench with lust. Aoi nuzzled Gackt's hip like a cat before letting his lips purr across that hot shaft.  A naughty tease sure to be rewarded with more of that teasing frustration. Aoi laid down beneath Gackt and let one knee bend up, laying it outward so that he was completely open to Gackt's exploration.  He stroked a finger along Gackt's lips seductively and smiled at the possessive growl that erupted from his lover as those lips opened to try to nip at the digit.  
  
"Get the lube baby"  he said gently.  He watched Gackt roll over, admiring his tight ass as he fumbled for the required object.  Lazily he stroked himself, keeping himself hard so that Gackt wouldn't ever have to doubt Aoi wasn't loving every second of this.  Besides it felt good to touch himself as he let his lust for Gackt wash over him.  He still couldn't quite believe this was happening but if it was a dream it was the most erotic and detailed one he'd ever had. He waited until Gackt had settled back down beside him and handed him the lube.  
  
"First you need to learn my body, take your time to explore it.  Breach me with a finger gently, learn what it feels like when I relax.  Crook your finger a bit inside and make love to me with your hand.  Learn and memorize that special spot inside that makes me cry out with pleasure.  Even if I don't say it, I think you'll know when I'm ready for a second finger."  
  
Gackt nodded his understanding.  He was all about mapping Aoi's body and all of his pleasure zones.  He leaned over Aoi possessively and dipped his head licking and nipping at Aoi's neck.  He trailed his mouth down, exploring the feel of Aoi's collarbone under his lips and under the scrape of his teeth.  Aoi's skin was so perfectly pale and pinked up so easily.  It thrilled him that he could leave a map of his possession so easily, a map that would quickly fade and leave him perfect and unmarred and ready to be marked, time and time again. Aoi huffed small pants of pleasure as he just melted into the bed and let Gackt explore him as slowly or as fast as he dared.  He felt .. worshipped... that was how thoroughly his torso was explored with that hot soft mouth.  By the time Gackt had reached the groove that marked the juncture of his hips they were rocking needily and he was whimpering softly with pleasure and desire.  
  
Gackt drove him nuts by completely bypassing his cock in his oral explorations. Aoi was glad he'd shaved himself baby smooth down there in his preparations.  He still had a small tuft of pubic hair in the front, enough to give a sexy hint at a grand prize if his pants hung low enough.  But he'd shaved his balls and his rear smooth.  Gackt's lips felt impossibly soft and slightly cool against his heated testicals but his tongue felt hot and he moaned lewdly at the feel of it.  One of his testicals was sucked experimentally into Gackt's mouth and his hand reflexively threaded itself in Gackt's scalp to encourage more.  " _oh... god._.." he moaned. The pressure on that tender flesh strange and wonderful.  He couldn't ever remember anyone sucking on his balls before but it felt amazing.  The other testical was given the same devotion and Aoi felt the precum dribble onto his abdomen at the pleasure of it.  
  
Gackt was surprised of himself when he decided to suck on Aoi's testicals.  It was a strange idea but Aoi had told him he could explore anything he wanted.  He was pleasantly surprised that Aoi was so smooth, the lack of pubic hair making his natural musk not so strong.  The flavor of this tender skin so much different from the rest of Aoi's body but not in a bad way.  The lewd sounds that fell from Aoi's mouth, the grip in his hair and uttered curse told him that Aoi heartily approved.  He'd have to remember that for future use.  Aoi bent his leg higher, granting Gackt greater access to move lower, and he did.  He used one hand to brace Aoi's testicals up out of the way while he kissed and suckled his way across Aoi's taint to his winking hole.  
  
Gackt smiled at the sight, for Aoi's entrance was fluttering just like his own hole was.  He let Aoi's testicals fall in order to have both hands free with the tube of lube, and tried to figure out how to do 3 things at once.  Aoi helped him out by reaching down and holding his heavy sack out of Gackt's way.  The beautiful guitarist was considerate that way.  Gackt lubed up two fingers and smeared the gel across Aoi's entrance loving the needy moan that burst from his lover as he teased the bud.  Pressing gently he tested the opening with a bit pressure and was shocked when it suddenly relaxed open and all but sucked his finger in.  He sank it to the knuckle and savored the way Aoi bucked his hips at the intrusion.  His channel felt impossibly hot and soft, the entrance tight while the flesh beyond it seemed to carress him from all sides.  It was such a different texture from pussy.  A woman's vagina was soft and warm but it still had that firm muscular feel to it.  This was different and he loved it.  Pumping his finger in and out slowly, deeply, he began to crook his finger, twisting his wrist, seeking out that spot Aoi told him must be there.  He'd remembered that sharply intense pressure/pleasure when his own secret spot had been found.  He wanted to give that same pleasure to Aoi.  At last his finger prodded against something that had a bit firmer spongier texture than the rest of the flesh he'd felt inside and Aoi shouted and arched in pleasure letting him know he was right on target.  He adjusted his wrist and pushed his finger in deep so he flutter it right against that spot, watching as Aoi's hips shuddered up off the bed.  Incoherent sounds fell from his lovers lips but he felt confident that Aoi was ready for a second finger now.  Aoi had said he would know.  Slowly he pressed a second finger inside, seating them firmly as he wiggled his fingers against Aoi's prostate to wring another cry from before resuming the simulation of sex.  
  
He moved his fingers at first with long slow deep strokes, feeling those rings of muscles near Aoi's entrance stretch and pull against each penetration and retreat.  Aoi had been correct that he needed to learn this.  Needed to learn that exact moment when he could feel Aoi relax and take the new girth with ease.  He knew he was thick and he would need to relax Aoi much wider than just two fingers before he could finally sink inside.  Surreptitiously he reached down, trying to gauge how many of his own fingers wide he was.  It felt like almost 4.  Aoi had taken 2 with incredible ease but he didn't know how well he'd be able to take 4 and he didn't want to rush things. It was extremely important that Aoi's body only ever know pleasure from his cock and not pain.  If his beautiful lover couldn't handle him ... he winced in sorrow.  If Aoi couldn't handle him - if he couldn't bear penetration without pain - then they would just have to deal with that, forgoing that aspect of their love lives and just accept whatever Aoi could give him.  Still, he hoped that would not be the case.  He wanted to be able to give as well as recieve.  
  
He took his cues from Aoi, remembering what the other had done to him that had made him come undone. He sped up the stroke of his fingers, curling them to bump Aoi's prostate with each penetration.  Aoi's cries increased in volume and it sounded like his lover was close to coming but he knew he'd have to do to Aoi what his lover had done to him.  Distract him from the painful stretch of that forth finger by timing it with his lover's orgasm.  He leaned up to suckle a testical into his mouth using the act as a distraction as he pressed a third finger inside.  Aoi hissed but didn't cry out in pain, his hole clenching only once before it relaxed enough for him gently seat all three fingers.  He just let them sit there,  feeling as Aoi's body tested the experience of the invasion.  He continued to suckle on the testical, waiting for Aoi to either relax more or indicate that it was too much and for him to remove his hand.  
  
Aoi's leg moved up and he heard a grunt that sounded like discomfort as he felt the movement cause Aoi's entrance to clench tighter around his fingers.  "Aoi?" He asked... worried that it was too much.  Aoi's leg relaxed back down.  "I'm okay baby... just ...move.  I promise I'll let you know it's too much.  You're taking such good care of me baby... keep going".    Aoi's voice was soft and gruff with lust, though the words were stiff enough that he knew Aoi was trying to play off how much it hurt.  Gackt fluttered his fingers, rubbing his fingers on Aoi's prostate as he gently moved his fingers barely in and out.  There was so much resistance to the movement that he was worried it would never be able to relax enough for him to move them with the same ease he'd been able to take the same amount of fingers from Aoi.  But then, Aoi's fingers were smaller than his own.  
he leaned up and took Aoi's cock into his mouth, seeking to give his lover as much pleasure as he could to help him get through the discomfort.  They were both stubborn enough not to back down from a little pain, but he did hope that Aoi would keep his promise not to let the discomfort get too bad.  A hand threaded into his hair again as his lover began to encourage him.  "That's right baby, suck me down.  Work those fingers in my tight ass, stretch me out for your taking.  Come on baby, I can take it.. fuck me with your hand baby...make me cum"  The words went straight to Gackt's cock and he growled around Aoi's shaft.  He sped up the light pumping of his fingers, allowing them to pull further and further out, feeling Aoi's body start to accept the invasion of his fingers stretching his lover wide.  He experimented with the configuration of his fingers and the twist of his wrist until he could penetrate Aoi with hard deep strokes that met only mild resistance.  Sharp cries and moans of pleasure fell from Aoi's lips along with short encouraging words that goaded Gackt on.  At last Aoi bucked his hips hard, his cum splashing across Gackt's tongue with no warning, Aoi's hole clenching around his fingers in a series of death grips.  Gackt suckled on the head and experimentally pumped his hand a few times testing the mettle of Aoi's body and relieved to meet almost not resistance at all, the orgasm serving to finally relax Aoi fully to the debauchery of his hand.  
  
Aoi lay panting on the bed, relieved that the pleasure had finally far overwhelmed the pain.  He'd not wanted Gackt to guess how badly those three fingers had burned but the orgasm was worth it.  Trying to watch Gackt's face as he bent himself to the task of preparing his lover was also worth it.  Gackt was so open and vulnerable, he could see every emotion reveal itself in his features.  His concern and fear for Aoi's pain, his look of triumph when he'd finally found Aoi's prostate.  His lust and possessiveness when Aoi had talked dirty to him.  His efforts to distract his lover from the discomfort of this necessary preparation.  It was all  _worth_  it. Any pain really was worth helping Gackt become a more confident lover.  Was worth seeing him so open and vulnerable and unselfconscious.  
  
Gackt finally let Aoi fall from his mouth as he leaned down to kiss Aoi's hip.  "Are you okay baby?"  He asked, still gently working his hand inside of Aoi's warm channel.  Aoi nodded.  "I'm good baby.  You made me cum real hard.  I'm sorry I lost myself too much to warn you".  
Gackt smiled and nipped playfully at Aoi's hip.  "It's okay.  I like the taste of your cum, I love that I could make you orgasm without warning."   Gackt looked up meeting Aoi's sated gaze.  Searching for something, for some sign it might be okay to break the bad news. "Baby um.. I know that was hard for you and we can stop here if you need to but... "  Aoi tried to give him an encouraging smile, knowing what was coming next.  "But what baby?"  
  
Gackt sighed heavily.  "I think we need to work you through another orgasm with a fourth finger otherwise I might injure you if I... but I know that three hurt.  You denied it but I could feel how tense you were.  I don't want to hurt you baby.  I don't want your body to associate mine with pain."   _And I don't want to be a selfish prick and guilt trip you into letting me hurt you if it's all too much._  
  
He didn't say it out loud, but Aoi could see the pain and fear on his face.  He was terrified he was too big for Aoi to ever take comfortably.  Well, hell, even Aoi had that fear.  But they worked and stretched him out together and those 3 painful fingers weren't painful anymore.  They felt incredibly good.  Aoi was fairly confident that they could work past the pain of a fourth one.  Aoi saw it as a painful task they'd only ever have to do once.  If they were able to truly make love, then the next time Gackt started to prep him his body would have the memory of the pleasure to be had if it allowed itself to be stretched and would welcome the invasion more willingly.  Right now though, it was confused.  
  
"I'm okay baby.  I really am.  The pain was worth the orgasm.  It'll only hurt like this once.  Then my body will remember how amazing it felt to be so completely possessed.  My body will open more willingly for you each time, once it knows the pleasure you can bring me.  But you haven't given it that memory yet.  You're doing so good though, baby.  Keep going.  I want to feel you cum inside me."  
  
He searched Aoi's face, but his eyes shone only with love and trust.  Aoi trusted him, and needed him to finish this so he could truly make love to this dark angel.  His drug.  His addiction. He bent his head to worship Aoi's softening cock and balls as he gently pulled his fingers back far enough to press a fourth one in beside the others.  He didn't so much as press them in, as just place them there the pressure of the fourth finger gently asking entrance to Aoi's body. He felt Aoi take a deep breath and press his hips slowly, tentatively down upon his fingers.  Felt his lovers sphincter begin to stretch and relax as they worked to gently seat his hand.  Slowly , oh so slowly with only a few hisses from Aoi they succeeded in seating Gackt's hand fully, his thumb tracing soothing circles on his lovers taint.  It burned terribly, enough to cause tears to escape his eyes but he quickly brushed them away lest Gackt see and retreat as he was wont to do when he was scared.  Aoi could feel his hole clenching tightly, his body trying to push out and reject this too-full invasion.  
  
He panted softly trying to not to whimper and reached his hand down to stroke his cock, another reaching up to tease his nipples.  Tried to let his mind focus on Gackt's talented mouth and not the pain in his ass.  His mind played over every minute of the last few weeks. Played through every encounter from their first kiss to everything in between and Aoi could finally feel himself relax.  That deep burning desire once again warming him, that sense memory of his prostate for the pleasures of the flesh returning.  " _yeah... oh yeah..."_  he moaned, the pain becoming less intense as each memory flashed through him, the pain turning to a burn which turned into a need for friction and the heat of blood engorged flesh. Gackt worked at pleasuring the parts of Aoi his mouth could reach from his position, afraid to look at the Aoi and see the pain there that he knew he was the cause of.  
  
Gackt’s own mind played over the last few weeks as he came to realize that he was in love with and desired a  ** _man_**  with more passion and with a greater intensity than he had anyone else in his life.  He'd been in love, and in lust many times but never like this.  It still amazed him that he'd come to accept Aoi so quickly, amazed that his body hadn't seemed to reject Aoi's at all when he never would have imagined he'd ever be having anal sex.  Had never even had anal sex with any of his girlfriends, since before Aoi he'd never been an ass man.  He remembered the feel of Aoi's nails on his back the first time they made out, the feel of his hands entangled in Aoi's raven locks.  The feel of Aoi's plump ass in his palms as they ground against each other.  He moaned at the memories and smiled when he caught Aoi's husky moan, felt him relax around his hand.  He wondered what memory it was that triggered Aoi's acceptance?  It didn't matter, not really, for each memory was a treasure.  He pumped his hand experimentally, the resistance tight but not tense with pain. " _oh... fuck .. fuck yeah_.." Aoi moaned and Gackt breathed a sigh of relief that Aoi had come to pleasure so much more quickly than with the first invasion of his third finger.  He looked up and the sight of Aoi stroking his dick and moaning was almost enough to make him cum right there.  "oh yeah baby...  _harder_... make me cum... I wanna cum baby... come on come on... make me scream for you" Gackt leaned up, letting his heavy sex rest in the juncture of Aoi's thigh, in the crevice formed between his swollen sack and hot sex.  He reached down and awkwardly dribbled some lube on his dick then let the bottle drop as he began to rock his hips in time with the movement of his hand.  A shift of his body and Gackt felt hands touching his shaft, stroking their cocks as Aoi's hips started to rock harder against his hand, seeking its own pleasure.   Gackt moaned at the pleasure of it, of Aoi's hands on him, of the heat of their erections rubbing together as he sought to peg Aoi's prostate with each deep thrust.  With sharp cries and half uttered curses Aoi finally cried out, his cum splashing far enough to leave threads of it in his hair that was fanned across the pillow.  Gackt felt him clench once again rhythmically against his hand and winced when he heard Aoi hiss.  "Burns so good baby, so good.  Now I know I can have you the way I've wanted you since I first opened my eyes and saw the face of the angel who'd kissed me under the roses.  Come here baby.  Kiss me again".  
  
Gackt reluctantly pulled his hand free, though with some relief that as before there seemed to be much less resistance in his retreat. He wiped his hand on the bed as he crawled over his lover to rest over him, taking his lips in a heated kiss.  Aoi wound his hands in Gackt's hair and held him close, dominating the kiss until he could feel Gackt rocking his hips against his own in the same rhythm of his tongue.  "Make love to me baby, the way you dreamed it would be.  Take me down slow and deep.  Fill this emptiness inside with the warmth of your abiding love."  
  
Gackt's heart melted at Aoi's words, his body dazed with the pleasure of the kiss and the taste of Aoi's passion. Gently he reached down between them and placed himself at Aoi's quivering entrance.   Then a thought occurred to him and he blushed sitting up quickly and frantically pawing around Aoi's hips until his hand found the bottle of lube.  He coated himself generously and even inserted the tip and squirted some of it into Aoi's waiting channel before he returned to lean over his new lover.  Gripping himself in hand he nudged the entrance.  "I'll be really gentle baby, just breathe okay?  I love you so much, so very very much and I'm proud to have a lover who's willing to suffer so much so we can be together.  I'll spend the rest of my life humbled by what you've done."  
  
Gently he pushed forward, waiting for Aoi to open and accept him. Aoi pulled him forward and captured his lips in a hungry kiss, one ankle coming up to rest on his leg, a signal to continue.   The stretch was different than the fingers, being as it was stretching in all directions at once and some directions weren't as used to it as others.  But it was a bearable pain and he felt himself squeak with pleasure when that broad head slowly stroked past his prostate.  He'd wanted to take all of Gackt, but found that there was an increasing pressure to his advance that was becoming uncomfortable.  They'd maybe have to work on it, but he didn't want to press his luck.  Not now that Gackt was finally sheathed within him.  He nudged him to stop.  "Are you okay baby?"  Asked Gackt.  "Do you need me to pull out?"  a worried look on his face.  Aoi smiled lovingly at him.  "No baby, I'm fine I just don't think I can take  _all_  of you right now.  Let's just work on this much okay?"     
  
Gackt flushed, glad that Aoi was okay.  Leaning back up he adjusted his knees then pulled back out a little ways so he could fist the base of his cock, preventing him from accidentally going deeper than Aoi was comfortable with.  Gently he tested the waters, the feel of Aoi's body like nothing he'd ever felt.  The tight ring of muscles at the entrance gripped and stroked him in the most satisfying way, while his soft depths felt as heavenly as Aoi's mouth.  When his head rubbed Aoi's prostate it was like being licked or something, and it felt amazing.  He loved the way Aoi cried out, his obvious pleasure letting him speed up his strokes just a little.  Small fast pants of high pitched pleasure fell from Aoi’s lips as he lost all ability to create coherent sounds.  What he was feeling as Gackt moved so tenderly inside him was indescribable.  The pleasure and that strange intensity like nothing he'd ever experienced from anal sex before.  oh yes, it was so worth it, even if it hurt that much with every preparation, it was worth this feeling now.  Another orgasm was racing for him and he began to chant against Gackt's lips. "mine, mine, mine, mine" with each penetration.   _This pleasure and pain are mine.  You are mine.  This passion is mine. This love is mine._ This time he came with a soft cry, as tremors of pleasure shook his body, wave after wave of such intense pleasure it was nearly overwhelming.  The feel of Aoi's orgasm stroking him as it had stroked his fingers wrung his own orgasm from him as he emptied himself in his lover.  Gackt’s body bucked and shuddered, wanting to be seated fully but he resisted the urge to press past the point Aoi had indicated.  Aoi's passion as he shattered was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and he engraved the memory of it in his brain.  
  
Gently he pulled out and began lap up the spent evidence of Aoi's passion.  Small worshipful licks as he tenderly cleaned him of every drop of cum on his chest.  Then he trailed down, cleaning and suckling the sensitive glans and shaft of Aoi’s penis before continuing lower to give some attention to Aoi's poor abused anus.  He settled himself down and began gently licking and lathing the winking hole, lapping up every drop of his seed that Aoi's body expelled, crooning encouragment to his lover.  "That's right baby, I've got you... I'll make you'll feel all better"  he said, continuing to worship Aoi's ass until it had stopped quivering and gently tightened closed again. Watching those men do this on the porn had nauseated him, but now in this moment it was one of the most intimate acts he could think of performing for his lover and he felt no shame or distaste in it.   
  
Aoi lay there sated and limp and sore as shit but the tender care that Gackt gave him rocked him to his core.  He just lay there letting Gackt clean him off and almost protested when he started to move lower, the waning endorphins warning him he'd have trouble sitting for a while.  But Gackt's tongue felt so good, so soothing to his abused entrance.  It seemed like Gackt must have licked his wounded entrance for hours, or at least long enough that by the time he came up for air Aoi was hard again but was too sleepy and sated to do anything about it.  Gackt climbed up to lay beside Aoi, kissing him tenderly as his fingers traced along Aoi's turgid shaft.  "Do you feel better baby?"  He asked.  Aoi nodded as he emitted a contented little sound, pushing Gackt back so he snuggle himself half draped across the other's body.  The movement trapped his swollen shaft in the groove of Gackt's hip, a dip that seemed perfectly made for it.  "I love you baby"  he murmured as sleep pulled him down into slumber that was nowhere near the perfection of reality.

  
Gackt stared in amazement of the beauty in his arms.  Aoi was so strong, so vital, so beautiful and frail.  He was Gackt's mirror image in so many ways, and yet the ways they varied perfectly balanced each other.  With a contented sigh and thankful prayer to the heavens he carefully pulled a blanket over them, careful not to disturb Aoi's sleep.  Then sleep claimed him as well with perfect contentment. It wasn’t going to be an easy road for them, especially with their conflicting schedules, but Gackt couldn’t see his life without Aoi in it.  He would find a way to make it work, the world be damned. 

 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Senpai Sins](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1108977) by [eilonwe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/eilonwe/pseuds/eilonwe)




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